THE SILENT COMPETITION
沉默的竞争
Do you have a competitive colleague who usually keeps you at arm's length?
你是否有个和你有竞争关系,平时很疏远你的同事?
Asking engaging questions is by far the best approach here. How about asking why they decided to attend or what they're looking forward to that week?
问一些有关参加聚会的问题最好不过了。比如,问问对方为什么决定参加?或者那一周有什么期待?
Keep things short and sweet and don't fall into the trap of talking too much. Sometimes it is wise to mirror the other person's pace of conversation.
对话要简洁明了,千万不要说太多。谈话节奏跟着对方来是很聪明的做法。
If you are met with out and out silence, then at least you've tried. Never feel awkward about silence, conversation is a two-way street but it helps to have some conversation points prepared in case.
如果遇到冷场,那至少你已经尝试过了。不要对冷场感到尴尬,谈话是双向沟通,但提前准备好想说的话很管用。
THE STRANGER
陌生人
In large companies you might find yourself thrown together with people you've never met or barely spoken to before.
在大公司里,你会发现自己在聚会上遇到了陌生同事,或者几乎没说过话的同事。
It may sound obvious but introduce yourself really clearly, ask their name and repeat it often to have a better chance of remembering it.
当然要清楚地介绍自己,询问对方的姓名并重复一遍,这样才能记得更牢。
Although it can, and often does sound a little awkward at first, once you're over this molehill the conversation will flow much better.
尽管最初常常略显尴尬,但随后你们的交谈就会更顺畅。
Smiling through the conversation will put the other person at ease and it'll make them feel comfortable and realise that you are actually interested in what they are saying. You should always make eye contact too. Remember that they may be just as nervous as you too, so there's never a real need to worry.
交谈时面带微笑能让对方更放松。这让对方感到舒服,觉得你真的对他们所说的感兴趣。经常保持目光接触。记住,他们可能和你一样紧张,所以没什么可担心的。
YOUR BOSS
老板
If you're in a social situation with your boss, keep it casual and don't get into work conversations at a party.
如果和老板凑在了一起,要随意,不要在派对上谈工作。
Stay respectful though and don't approach if intoxicated – especially if you have issues you want to air – alcohol will act as a truth serum that you'll regret.
保持尊敬,如果醉酒了不要离老板太近,特别是当你有问题想和老板说时。酒后吐真言,但你会后悔。
But above all be yourself. Don't feel you have to stay overly formal just because it's your boss. All bosses are just people too.
但最重要的还是做你自己。不要因为对方是老板就过度拘谨。老板也是凡人。
THE COLLEAGUE YOU DON'T GET ON WITH
合不来的同事
In this situation, be aware of your body language. An open stance with the right amount of space between you and them is important.
这种时候要注意自己的肢体语言。自己采取开立姿势,并和对方保持足够距离很重要。
Listening is key here too, it'll make you look and feel confident if you are engaged.
倾听也很关键。这会让你在参与谈话时看起来感觉很自信。
Keep a natural amount of eye contact and remember to be yourself - don't let someone else sap your confidence.
保持自然的目光接触,记住要做你自己,不要让别人伤了你的自信。
A great tip if you are really anxious is to imagine a clear barrier or wall between you, which is your confidence protector - using this technique will keep your self-confidence intact. An awkward conversation shouldn't change your whole day, so hang on to your confidence using the wall.
如果你很焦虑,还有个好办法,设想你们之间有一道清晰的屏障或者一堵墙,保护着你的自信。这样做能使你的自信不受伤害。一场尴尬的对话不应该毁掉你的一整天,所以就用这堵墙维护好你的自信吧。
DON'T TALK ABOUT
不要谈论:
No talking about the weather! Please. I know this can be an ice breaker but come on - it's dull.
不要谈论天气!千万别。我知道这能活跃气氛,但拜托,这太无趣了。
Refrain from excusing yourself or putting yourself down - this is no way to have a decent conversation with anyone and all it does is put you in a position of weakness.
不要为自己辩解,也不要贬低自己,这样做没法和别人体面交谈,而只能让自己处于弱势。
Steer clear of gossip and slating others. Tongues get loose when alcohol is involved and it's always a regret the next day!
不要八卦,也不要中伤他人。喝了酒很多人都变大嘴巴,第二天想起来就后悔!
DO TALK ABOUT
可以聊这些:
Talk about your passions; music, work, news.
谈论你热衷的事情:音乐、工作、资讯。
Make sure the other person is involved in the conversation so it's not just you talking for example 'I've just come back from France on holiday, where have you been this year?'
确定对方参与到了谈话中,而不是只有你在自说自话。比如:“我刚从法国度假回来,今年你去哪里旅游了?”
Always be interested in the other person. Make them the focus and you'll be remembered for making others feel good and interesting. Always compliment, but make it genuine!
表现出对于对方的兴趣。让交谈对象成为焦点,大家会认为和你交谈感觉很好,很有趣。记得多称赞别人,但要真诚!
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