会做这10件事的人，都是懂得感恩的人(上)

1. Journal.

记日记。

Research has shown that writing down what you're thankful for can lead to a multitude of wellness benefits. In order to reap the full benefits of journaling, Emmons，a gratitude researcher and psychology professor at the University of California, recommends writing for five to 10 minutes every other day. "You really need to commit to doing it, and if you write it down eventually it will become more automatic," Emmons says. "It's like exercise, you need to have a plan. You need to have a gratitude action plan, whether it's waking up and writing in the morning or in the evening before you go to sleep."

研究显示记下你所感激的东西对健康大有益处。为了充分发挥记日记的好处，加利福尼亚大学的感恩研究员兼心理学教授埃蒙斯建议每隔一天写5-10分钟日记。埃蒙斯说：“你真的需要专心投入，如果你都写下来，最终会成为习惯。就像做锻炼需要有一个计划，你要有一个感恩行动计划，无论是早起写日记还是晚上睡前写都可以。”

2. Don't avoid the negative.

不会躲避消极的东西。

Expressing gratitude may generate more optimism, but thankful people also don't shy away from the negative. Emmons says that while we often associate gratitude with focusing on the good and avoiding the bad, the key to leading a thankful life is embracing setbacks as part of your overall journey. Emmons suggests recalling a hard time you once experienced -- chances are, you'll start to feel grateful for your current state and overcoming former challenges.

表达感恩会产生更多乐观情绪，但感恩的人也不会躲避消极情绪。埃蒙斯称，我们总是觉着感恩就是关注好事、躲避坏事，但生活中感恩的关键是把挫折视为整个生命旅程的一部分。埃蒙斯建议你回忆曾经历过的一段困难时期，然后你可能就会开始因目前的状态和成功应对了之前的挑战而感恩。

3. Spend time with loved ones...

和爱的人在一起…

Thankful people know they didn't get to where they are by themselves -- and they make it a habit to spend time with those people who matter most. "Gratitude really helps us connect to other people," Emmons says. "It actually strengthens relationships and relationships are the strongest predictors of happiness and coping with stress."

感恩的人知道走到现在不是靠他们自己——他们养成了和对他们最重要的人在一起的习惯。埃蒙斯说：“感恩真的能帮我们和其他人联系在一起，真的增强了人际关系，而人际关系是幸福和应付压力最强有力的预示。”

4. ...And tell them you love them.

...还要告诉他们你爱他们。

Expressing appreciation for loved ones can also help create a closeness by allowing others to see how you look at them. And stating how much you appreciate your loved ones pays off. A recent study published in the journal Personal Relationships found that couples who expressed gratitude in their relationship had better marriages.

对你爱的人表达感激让他们知道你多在乎他们，这也有助于增进感情。向你所爱的人表达你的感激也会有回报，最近的一项发表在《人际关系》杂志上的研究发现，夫妻相处时表达感激会提高婚姻质量。

5. Use social media mindfully.

谨慎使用社交网络。

Emmons says, thankful people mindfully take advantage of social media. "[Thankful people] use whatever cues that exist in everyday environments to trigger grateful thoughts," he says. Research has found that positive thoughts shared on social media spread faster than than negative. Emmons suggests assembling an archive of postings on Facebook and Instagram to pull from when you need a reminder to be grateful. This method will help you cue happy memories through pages that you normally visit on a daily basis. "Technology and devices are criticized because you're less connected, but if used correctly I think it can be the opposite," Emmons said.

埃蒙斯说：“感恩的人谨慎利用社交网络。‘感恩的人’会把生活环境中一切情绪都转化为感恩。”研究发现社交网络上分享的积极思想比消极思想传播得更快，埃蒙斯建议搜集大量Facebook和Instagram上的帖子来提醒你要感恩。这个方法能通过你每天都访问的那些页面给你带来幸福回忆的暗示。埃蒙斯说：“现代技术和设备之所以受到批判，是因为你与身边人的联系减少了，但如果使用得当，我认为它们会有相反的效果。”