How to Deal With Difficult People
In New York City one day, a businesswoman got into a taxi. Because it was rush hour and she was hurrying for a train, she suggested a route. Ive been a cabby for 15 years! the driver yelled. You think I dont know the best way to go?
The woman tried to explain that she hadnt meant to offend him, but the driver kept yelling. She finally realized he was too upset to be reasonable. So she did the unexpected. You know, youre right, she told him. It must seem dumb for me to assume you dont know the best way through the city.
Taken aback, the driver flashed his rider a confused look in the rear-view mirror, turned down the street she wanted and got her to the train on time. He didnt say another word the rest of the ride, she said, until I got out and paid him. Then he thanked me.
When you encounter people like this cab driver, theres an irresistible urge to dig in your heels. This can lead to prolonged arguments, soured friendships, lost career opportunities and broken marriages. As a clinical psychiatrist, Ive discovered one simple but extremely unlikely principle that can prevent virtually any conflict or other difficult situation from becoming a recipe for disaster.
The key is to put yourself in the other persons shoes and look for the truth in what that person is saying. Find a way to agree. The result may surprise you.
Sulkers Steves 14-year-old son, Adam, had been irritable for several days. When Steve asked why, Adam snapped, Nothings wrong! Leave me alone! and stalked off to his room.
We all know people like this. When theres problem, they may sulk(生闷气) or act angry and refuse to talk.
So whats the solution? First, Steve needs to ask himself why Adam wont talk. Maybe the boy is worried about something that happened at school. Or he might be angry at his dad but afraid to bring it up because Steve gets defensive whenever he is criticized. Steve can pursue these possibilities the next time they talk by saying, I noticed youre upset, and I think it would help to get the problem out in the open. It may be hard because I havent always listened very well. If so, I feel bad because I love you and dont want to let you down.
If Adam still refuses to talk, Steve can take a different tack: Im concerned about whats going on with you, but we can talk things over later, when youre more in the mood.
国内英语资讯:Chinas top legislator to visit Norway, Austria, Hungary
体坛英语资讯:Brazil to meet Honduras, Qatar in pre-Copa America friendlies
体坛英语资讯:Elizabeth Cambage signs for Shanxi womens basketball club
体坛英语资讯:Herrmann pens contract extension at Monchengladbach
体坛英语资讯:Chinese forward Wu Lei commits his future to Espanyol
国内英语资讯:China sees progress in occupational disease prevention, treatment
国际英语资讯:Pakistan reaches agreement with IMF for 6 bln USD package over 3 years
国际英语资讯:Trump says to meet with Russias Putin at G20
研究发现:55岁是当领导的黄金年龄
百事可乐要直接用夜空打广告
国内英语资讯:China Focus: Foreign-invested enterprises benefit from Chinas IPR protection
国内英语资讯:Regulations on inspections of building rule-of-law govt published
国际英语资讯:Spotlight: Turkey urges U.S. to accept approval on technical examination to avoid S-400 cris
体坛英语资讯:Su Bingtian and Xie Zhenye team up to run mens 4x100m relay in IAAF World Relays Yokohama
体坛英语资讯:Adriano reveals comeback plans
杀手包、饺子包……这些奢侈品手袋的昵称是怎么来的?
国内英语资讯:China strengthens disaster prevention, relief education
Taylor Swift和碧昂斯的粉丝吵起来了
健身房也开始消费升级,升级方式:住在健身房
国际英语资讯:UN monitoring team verifies Yemens Houthi withdrawal from Hodeidah ports
国内英语资讯:Exhibition kicks off to showcase splendor of Asian civilizations
科学家称玩嗨了有助于学习
国内英语资讯:China, Russia, U.S. should make more joint efforts on world stability, development: Chinese
体坛英语资讯:Garin stuns Zverev to reach ATP Munich semi
薪水高有什么坏处?
体坛英语资讯:Pele hails sensational Messi
Justin Bieber缺席Met Gala,妻子海莉独自亮相
国内英语资讯:Top political advisor meets with Taiwan delegation led by Hung Hsiu-chu
国际英语资讯:UN Day of Vesak opens in Vietnam
国际英语资讯:Sri Lanka imposes nationwide curfew following violent clashes
不限 |
英语教案 |
英语课件 |
英语试题 |
不限 |
不限 |
上册 |
下册 |
不限 |