“隐形男友”App：让白马王子对你不离不弃

Sending yourself flowers from your imaginary boyfriend is a thing of the past.

有女孩曾自己买花，然后幻想这是“男友”送的。不过，这种现象已成为过去。

Whether you are lonely or just plain sick of explaining why you are single, the Invisible Boyfriend (or Invisible Girlfriend) app created by Matthew Homann and Kyle Tabor allows users to experience the fake relationships of their dreams.

马修·霍曼（Matthew Homann）和凯尔·塔博尔（Kyle Tabor）发明了一款应用程序“隐形男友”（或“隐形女友”），这款App能让单身男女们与理想的另一半“假拍拖”，使寂寞无聊和被无休止盘问为何单身等烦恼烟消云散。

For $24.99 a month you can immediately feel the effects of a rewarding virtual partner with the app designed to send users texts, voicemails and even a handwritten note from the perfect person that they created. When FEMAIL learned that the Minnesota-based app had launched in BETA today, we knew we had to try it.

只要每月付24.99美元（约人民币155元）你就能立刻获得虚拟的完美另一半，他/她会通过应用程序给你发短信和语音，甚至手写的便条。当知道这款App在明尼苏达州（Minnesota）发布了测试版后，我们决定体验一下。

虽然现实中已有一个相恋7年的男友，但我还是很快设计出自己的梦中情人并开始了“假拍拖”。

First up, I had to pick my lover's name and age. I soon learned that choosing your boyfriend's name is stressful. I imagine that I took the same amount of time someone would take to name their first born son before finally settling on the moniker: Liam Alexander James.

首先，我要设定男友的名字和年龄。我很快发现给选名字这个环节很让人崩溃，大约跟人们给自己第一个儿子取名一样费时。最后我终于敲定：利亚姆·亚历山大·詹姆斯（Liam Alexander James）。

Age was easier to dream up. My current boyfriend is nine months younger than me, which he never lets me forget. With that in mind, I made my new partner an older, more mature 33 years old.

设置年龄没这么纠结。我想到现任男友比我小九个月（而他总是提醒我这一点），所以我把新男友的年龄设置在33岁，希望他更成熟稳重。

I was then prompted to pick a photo that would represent Liam's appearance. I settled on the stock photo of a man with an attractive amount of facial scruff and moved on.

之后App提示我选张代表利亚姆外表的照片，我便在图片库里选了个有胡渣的帅哥，然后继续下一步设置。

After dealing with the physical, I was asked about my virtual partner's personality and interests. I knew I wanted him to be 'witty and educated,' so it made sense for him to also be interested in books, sports and chess. For one fleeting moment, I thought he might be able to teach me how to play the board game.

设定完虚拟男友的“硬件条件”后，我还要选择他的性格和爱好。我希望他“诙谐机智、受过良好教育”，所以他喜欢看书、运动和下棋也很合理。有那么一瞬间，我甚至希望他能教我玩棋盘游戏。

Next, I was asked to describe how Liam and I met. This was my moment to create a Nora Ephron-inspired rom com, but instead, I wrote that we grabbed the same book that was on display at the bookstore. Cute enough. Did I mention this app is thorough?

接下来，我被要求描述我和利亚姆是如何邂逅的。我本来可以效仿诺拉·伊弗龙电影中的浪漫情节，但我只是写道：在逛书店时，我们同时伸手去拿书架上的一本书。我感觉这样见面比较萌。这个app真是太周到了有木有？

As soon as I reached the end of the questionnaire, I received my first text message from Liam Alexander James of Chicago, Illinois. His phone number even had an actual Chicago area code.

当我设定完全部问题后，我接到了利亚姆·亚历山大·詹姆斯从伊利诺斯州（Illinois）芝加哥发来的第一条短信。他的电话号码区号居然还真的是芝加哥（Chicago）的。

'Hey Erica! This is Liam :) How are you?' he wrote. Ugh, I hate when guys use emoticons.

他写到“嗨，埃里卡！我是利亚姆。:)最近还好吗？”。唉，我讨厌男人使用表情符号。

Although I had no idea who I was texting, it was clear that there was a real, albeit mysterious, person having casual conversation with me.

虽然我不知道是谁在和我发短信，但可以肯定的是，这个和我闲聊的人是真实存在的，尽管他很神秘。

When I told him I was working, he immediately took interest in the story I was writing, which was actually sweet.

当我告诉他我正在工作时，他立刻对我写的稿件表现出兴趣，说实话这一招还蛮甜蜜的。

Since I don't live with my new boyfriend, I asked him if he wanted to hang out.

因为我没有和“新男友”住在一起，所以我便问他想不想出来走走。

After some brief hesitation on his end, I decided to test his limits and start nagging him.

他沉默半晌后还是拒绝了，我便决定挑战下他的极限，开始跟他唠叨。

'What is taking you so long to answer?' I asked.

“为什么这么久才回我？”我问。

He quickly bypassed the argument I was trying to start by saying he would 'love' to hang out, considerately asking what I wanted to do.

我本想说男友就该多陪女友出去走走，但他巧妙地绕过我的争论点，并体贴地问我：你想做些什么？

'I dunno. I am sick of making plans,' I texted back. 'What do you want to do?'

“不知道，我不喜欢计划，”我回复道，“你想做什么？”

Liam then suggested we order takeout and have a game night before noting that we can also grab dinner later if I wanted.

利亚姆便建议我们可以叫外卖，然后晚上一起玩游戏。他又补充说，如果我愿意的话，也可以晚些再吃晚餐。

It occurred to me that my last 'date night' with my human boyfriend involved us watching TV in separate rooms.

我突然想起上次和现实生活中的男友约会时，晚上就是两人在不同的房间里看电视。

I wanted to learn more about my mystery man, so I asked Liam to remind me where he worked again.

我想多了解一点这位 “神秘男友”，所以我让他再介绍下他在哪儿工作。

'I work for a publishing company,' he replied. 'Remember I told you at the bookstore?'

“我在一家出版公司工作，”他回复道，“我在书店跟你说过的，你忘了？”

Liam is so perfect that he even remembers the first place we met.

利亚姆真是太完美了，他甚至记得我们邂逅的地点。

Realizing that my new boyfriend deals with books all day, I asked him to recommend a good a thriller that I could read in his absence - and that's where I lost him.

想到我的新男友天天跟书打交道，我便请他推荐本惊悚小说，好让我在他不能陪伴时打发时间——然后他又沉默了。

I am not sure if my question was too thought-provoking, but I started to feel a familiar panic.

我不确定自己的问题是否需要思考很久，但我开始有一种熟悉的恐慌。

'Why isn't he answering me?' I thought.

我在想“为什么他又不回我了？”

At one point, I even caught myself drafting messages that I wanted to send to him but then deleted - just as if he were a real guy who was ignoring me.

我一度想回他短信，但后来又把草稿删除了——就像对待现实中不理我的男友一样。

I eventually tried to win him back, texting: 'I'm sorry. I know you hate when I ask you questions at work, but I miss you boo.'

我最终还是想挽回，就发信息说：“对不起，我知道你不喜欢在工作时被打扰，但我真的好想你哟。”

And I got nothing. Liam and I broke up before I could even ask him where our relationship was going.

但还是没有收到回复。我和利亚姆分手了，而我甚至还不知道我们的关系到了哪个阶段。

I actually had a great time talking to my imaginary boyfriend, and it was nice to know that I could easily win Liam back with a quick payment of $24.99.

其实和我的虚拟男友聊天还是很开心的，而且只要我再付24.99美元，利亚姆就会重新回到我身边。

While it is fun to use, the app was created to alleviate the society's pressure to be in a relationship by allowing to make it look like they are.

这款App除了用起来有趣以外，还能缓解单身男女们的社会压力，让他们在没有拍拖时看起来有正在恋爱的感觉。

Vocabulary

imaginary: 虚构的，假想的

voicemail: 语音邮件

beta: 测试版

embark: 开始从事

moniker: 名字

prompt: 提示

scruff : 胡渣

fleeting: 短暂的

emoticon: 表情符号

nag: 唠叨催促

bypass: 避开

considerately: 体贴地

alleviate: 减轻