根据美国研究人员的最新发现,如果一个人感到疲惫、崩溃或缺乏自信,不只是与个人有关,还可能与你的友谊有关。人的朋友大致可分这三种:良友、铮友、有毒朋友。有毒朋友是指那些用语言或行为给人带来困扰,让人感到精疲力尽、灰心丧气,最终破坏自己的心情和生活的朋友。
It can be challenging to recognize the damage caused by a toxic friendship, especially if you've known and cared about the person for a long time. But if you've resolved to be happier and healthier in the new year, taking stock of your relationships is a good place to start.
认清有毒朋友的危害非常难办到,特别是如果你已经认识他/她很久,关系也不错的时候。但如果你下决心想在新的一年中更快乐、更健康,清理一下你的朋友关系是个不错的开始。
In fact, 84 percent of women — and 75 percent of men — said they'd had a toxic friend at some point, with 1 in 3 survey takers fessing up to a toxic BFF.
事实上,84%的女性和75%的男性表示自己曾经有过有毒朋友,三分之一的受访者坦承曾经有过关系非常好的有毒朋友。
In a harmful relationship, you may feel the friend is insulting, critical, petty or selfish. A friend may ask for honest advice and then become angry when you deliver it, or do the opposite of what you suggest. A toxic friend may persist in giving unsolicited advice, or talk only about their own life and problems without considering your needs and feelings. Sometimes a friend may burden you with his or her own problems, whether it's job, money, or relationship woes -- but not offer any support in return.
在一段有害的朋友关系中,你可能会觉得这位朋友侮辱人、爱挑剔、小气或自私。一位有毒朋友可能会向你征求诚实的建议,但当你说出后他/她又很生气,或者干脆反着来;可能坚持未经请求就提出建议,或者只谈论自己的生活和问题,而不考虑你的需要和感受;有时还会因自己的问题增加你的负担,不管是工作、金钱还是个人关系的烦恼。但他们却从不给你提供任何支持。
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