Learn How to Listen
The people in the room were tense. Five young engineers were sitting with their boss. They were trying to settle details of an important new plant site for a major client.
Suddenly one of the young engineers gave what he thought was a good solution to the problem. What he had to say was greeted by an uncomfortable silence. The boss then laughingly pointed out that the same proposal had been made and turned down some minutes before.
The incident seemed funny at the time. But several months later it didnt. After the project had been successfully finished, most of the engineers who had worked on it were promoted. But the young man who had made a fool of himself at the meeting was passed over.
What had happened? The young engineer swore that he had never heard the proposal made and rejected. He was right. He was a victim of a bad listening habit that he didnt know he had.
Bad listening habits can hurt you a lot in your daily living. Much of your success, both in your work and social life, is related to how you listen. A number of major industries and more than twenty leading colleges have become very concerned about our bad listening habits. They have set up listening clinics and courses to find out what is wrong. And what to do about it! Why You Must Hear Correctly
My own experience as a teacher in one of these clinics has taught me that many people who seem to be listening miss important points. Therefore, they draw wrong conclusions from what is said. That is a serious problem when you consider our attitudes toward other people and success on the job. These attitudes are shaped more by the persuasive spoken word than by any other means of communication.
What are the faulty hearing habits that hurt us in so many ways? Here are some of the more common ones Ive observed in a close study of my many clinic students.
Our minds wont wait. Our thoughts can race along from four to ten times 72
faster than most people speak. So, while we are waiting for the words to come in, our thoughts tend to go off on a tangent And sometimes they remain away too long.
Your boss, perhaps, is discussing a situation with you. You want to hear it all. But what happens? Your mind tunes out. It comes back and tunes out again. Why doesnt someone kill that fly? I wonder who just came into the other room? Suddenly a few words come through. Since you agree with my suggestion, your boss says. . . What did he suggest? Such tuning-out gaps are common and sometimes costly.
We think we know already. Were so sure we know what the speaker is going to say that we listen with just half an ear.
A newspaper publisher once told me how this listening habit cost him a big gum of money.
A regular client telephoned an order for a new series of ads. The person taking the order simply wrote out a standard order form. Not until too late did the publisher learn that the client had wanted the new ads to be four times as large as the old. But the smaller ads had already been set in type by then. So the client decided to run them.
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