When you work with people day after day, you’re bound to make friends. If handled correctly friendships can make work so much more enjoyable, or at least tolerable if you’re in a less than desirable job, but there can also be some pitfalls if you’re not careful.
和别人朝夕相处地工作,你不得不去交朋友。人际关系处理得好,这份友谊能帮上大忙,带来欢乐,或至少能让你在处理烦闷工作时不那么烦躁。但如果处理得不当心,你就要注意办公室友情中的小陷进了。
Some of these friendships in the office will outlive the job; others will not. In either case, office friendships are a valuable part of any professional network and can be a boost to your career if managed in a professional manner. If mishandled they can do a tremendous amount of damage.
有些办公室友谊能让工作充满乐趣,有些则不然。无论何种情况,办公室友情都是职场社交圈中有价值的一部分,如果处理得当,会给你的职业带来促进作用。然而如果处理不当,带给你的只会是无穷尽的灾难。
1.Beware oversharing
1.不要分享过多
Share with caution. Take the time to get to know your co-workers a bit before divulging personal information and stay appropriate and professional even with those you trust. Have clear boundaries about what is "shareable" and what is not. Family updates, hobbies, interests, educational pursuits, etc. are all fair game. Illegal activities, intimate details, and "resume exaggerations", not so much.
分享的时候小心点。花点时间了解一下你的同事,再分享你的个人信息。即使和那些你信任的人也要注意得当专业。要对“可分享”有明确的界限,知道什么可以说什么不该说。家庭信息、爱好、乐趣、学业追求,这些都是不错的聊天话题。但是,非法活动、亲密细节,还有“夸大事实”,这些就不要多说了。
2.Nix the complaining
2.不要抱怨
No matter how well you know your "office friend" don’t gossip or complain about your boss. That’s a big no-no. It puts your office friend in a very uncomfortable situation and could be potentially damaging if your words ever reached the ears of the wrong person. Save your venting for your partner other personal friends outside of work.
无论跟“办公室朋友”多熟,都不要八卦或者抱怨老板。这个绝对绝对不要。这会让你的办公室朋友非常不舒服,如果这些话传到不该听到的人耳里甚至会毁了你。把这些吐槽都跟工作圈子外的朋友们说吧。
3.Maintain individuality
3.保持个性
Be careful that your office friendships don’t obscure your individual accomplishments and separateness. You still need to build and protect your individual reputation on the job. Especially in the beginning of your career, you need to shine and stand out from the crowd. Office alliances are part of the work culture, that’s fine, just don’t let your own contributions become overshadowed.
注意别让你的工作友情影响到你的个人成绩和独立性。你需要去建立和保护你的工作名声。特别是在工作初期,你得知道如何脱颖而出。办公室结盟是工作文化的一部分,但也别让自己的贡献被人遮掩。
4.Watch the gossip
4.小心八卦
It’s natural and normal for people to show an interest in what other people do and say. It’s not necessarily all bad providing it isn’t malicious, but be careful. Gossip can cause hurt feelings and stir up trouble and office drama create enemies that you don’t need or want. If you stay positive in your office conversations, you’ll never need to defend your words or repair hurt feelings. It’s important to build a reputation as a person who is respectful and who can keep information confidential, not as the "office gossip".
关心别人说了什么干了什么,这是人之常情。只要不是恶言恶语,八卦也不都是坏事,但还是要小心点。八卦会伤害别人的感情,带来麻烦和办公室谣言,甚至会给你带来不必要的敌人。如果你在办公室谈话中一直保持积极向上的态度,你就不必为解释自己的话或者和别人重修旧好而多费心思。在办公室里非常重要的一点就是,你要树立自己尊重他人、守口如瓶的口碑,而不要成为“办公室里的八卦王”。
5.Don’t play favorites
5.不要区别对待
Try to collaborate with and get to know other co-workers, so that they don’t feel excluded. It’s nice to have a friend in the office, but don’t play favorites. Be very clear that you will not show preference or extend special favors, nor will you cover up mistakes or dishonest behavior and that you do not expect it in return. Remember that when you’re at work, you’re working. Don’t discuss personal situations or concerns at the office even if you have a personal relationship outside of the office. It makes other co-workers uncomfortable and blurs the office/home line.
试着和同事合作了解,这样他们就不会觉得被排挤。在办公室有朋友固然好,但也不要区别对待。要确保你不会展现出各种偏爱或其他的特殊对待,也不要为别人的错误或者不良行为打掩护,还希望对方也能“投桃报李”。别在公司谈论个人情况或担忧,哪怕你们在公司之外还有个人交情。这会让其他的同事感到不舒服,破坏公司环境。
6.Diversify friendships
6.多样化的友谊
Many of us spend the majority of time at work, it’s true. And the common interests and dilemmas we share with our office friends may draw us together, but having a circle of friends outside of work is important as well. We need to turn off our “work brain” and separate ourselves from work regularly to keep stress at bay. Our “non-work” friends can help us to do that. It also helps us to cultivate a variety of friends, broaden our circle of support and keep our lives full and interesting.
大多数人都把大量的时间花在工作上,这是对的。和办公室朋友一起分享的共同兴趣或爱好也许会拉近我们的距离,但工作圈子外面的朋友也是至关重要的。我们需要关掉“工作大脑”,把自己和工作隔离开来以便减压。我们“工作圈”以外的朋友们能帮助我们做到这些。这样还能让我们拥有更多不一样的朋友,扩大我们的交际圈,让我们的生活更加充实有趣。
7.Navigate office "breakups"professionally
7.处理好“绝交”的办公室友情
It’s inevitable that for whatever reason, some office friendships, like any other, won’t last. When it happens, and it will, it’s imperative to remain professional. Be polite and courteous ALWAYS. No matter what has transpired, do not gripe and complain about your ex-friend to other workers. If the other party is petty and unprofessional, let it go. Stay professional and focus on doing your job. Don’t feed office drama. You’ll save yourself a lot of stress as well as demonstrate that you can handle conflict professionally.
办公室友情就和其他感情一样,会因为某些原因而结束。即使发生了这样的事情,也要保持自己专业的态度。时时都要礼貌谦虚。无论发生了什么,都不要和其他同事抱怨这个朋友。如果那个同事很烦人又不专业,那就不要做朋友了。保持自己的专业性,专注于你的工作。不要增加办公室八卦。这样你能给自己减轻很多压力,还能有效地处理纷争。
Building friendships at work can be very rewarding in many ways. If handled properly with a professional attitude, they can add a great deal of enjoyment to your work experience, but if handled poorly, they can make the office an uncomfortable, stress-filled place and derail your career in the process. Don’t let that happen to you.
很多时候办公室友情十分有价值。如果用专业的态度处理得当,就能给你的工作增添很多的乐趣,但如果处理不当,他们会让你的办公环境非常不舒服,充满压力,甚至破阻碍工作进程,别让这样的事情发生在你身上。
(实习编辑:于晓伟)
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