老外在中国：记一次北京公交车上的历险

我们终于挤上了一辆从车头到车尾都塞满了乘客的公交。不过这辆车倒还有那么一点点喘气的空间。不论怎样，我们这最后一批乘客总归搭上了公交。谁知，我想的太简单了。

By Randy Wright

Venturing out to tourist sites during a holiday can be risky business. You can be stuck for hours in traffic or, worse, get trampled.

选择节假日去景点是件冒险的事。赶上交通不畅，能堵好几个小时，更为糟糕的是，你还可能被踩到。

I won’t forget one visit I made to the Great Wall. The human horde inching along the parapet would have made a canned sardine grateful for his spacious quarters.

我忘不了之前有一回去长城，人流沿着城墙一寸一寸向前移动。那景象连罐子里的沙丁鱼看了都会感恩。相比之下，它们的空间毕竟还算宽敞。

And so it was with some trepidation last week that my wife and I hopped onto the subway and headed off to the Beijing Botanical Garden. On the bus from the station to the garden’s gate, I stoically refused to think about what we were about to face.

正因如此，上周我和妻子挤上地铁去往北京植物园的时候，心里还有点惴惴不安。从地铁站开往植物园门口的那段公交上，我刻意不想接下来可能会面对什么。

Surprise! The crowd inside was moderate, the skies were blue and many flowers were still in bloom. It was perfect. When the warm autumn day settled to dusk, it was time to board a bus for the return trip.

出乎意料！园中的游客数量只是中等不是很多，天空湛蓝，簇簇鲜花仍在绽放。一切堪称完美。等到和暖的秋光开始转暗，我们就该坐公交返程了。

This is where things got interesting.

而事情从此刻变得有点意思。

Everybody seemed to be leaving at once, and virtually every bus was crammed with people. Few stopped, and even the ones that did were hopelessly jammed.

这时候，似乎每个人都开始离开园区，只见每辆公交都差不多塞满了乘客。没有几辆会靠站停车，而且即便停下，车里也已挤得下不去脚。

Eventually, we managed to edge our way aboard a bus that was packed, bow to stern, but had a few cubic centimeters of breathable air. Somehow I ended up standing behind the driver, shoved there helpfully by the mass of bodies behind me.

后来，我们终于挤上了一辆从车头到车尾都塞满了乘客的公交。不过这辆车倒还有那么一点点喘气的空间。不知怎么，最终我被身后的人群推搡着挪到了司机身后的位置。

I envied the sardine.

我不禁羡慕起沙丁鱼。

Well, at least we’re the last passengers, I thought. Silly me.

不论怎样，我们这最后一批乘客总归搭上了公交。谁知，我想的太简单了。

The driver stopped again, and yet more people shouldered in — I don’t know how. They flowed into the slimmest of spaces. Everyone aboard shifted to the rear and tried to become thinner. At the next stop, this routine was repeated, and two or three more passengers got in. People compressed themselves ever more tightly down the center aisle as the driver shouted instructions.

司机再次停车，更多的人摩肩接踵地挤了进来——真不知他们是如何做到的。他们见缝插针填进了空档。所有人都向后方挪动，并极力让自己变得纤细些。等车开到下一站，同样的情形再度上演，又有两三个人上了车。按照司机喊出的指示，位于中间过道的人们把自己一缩再缩。

There were now 19 (!) people stuffed into the stairwell next to the driver. If you could have seen it from the outside, faces would have been plastered comically against the glass. Now it was clearly impossible to take on another passenger.

此时，司机旁边的车门台阶区域塞了19个人！如果你从车外向里看，定能看见人们的面容滑稽地贴到了窗玻璃上。显然，车里再也不可能加得进人了。

Silly me.

事情可没有那么简单。

At the next stop a woman beat on the door, shrieking at the driver. Unbelievably, he opened it! She would not be denied. After several minutes of shouting and jostling, a couple of men winched the woman onto the step but couldn’t close the door. Finally, they forcibly pulled the doors shut around her. As the glass bulged outward, I worried the whole bus might explode like an overinflated balloon.

接下来一站，一位女士猛敲车门，冲着司机大喊大叫。简直叫人难以置信，司机竟打开了车门！女士并没有遭到拒绝。几分钟的吵嚷推搡，两位男士费尽气力将女士拉上了台阶，可车门却关不上了。最后，大家一起强推她身旁的两扇车门，才终于合上。看到车窗玻璃向外鼓起，我担心整辆车会像充气过多的气球一样发生爆炸。

Proceeding to the subway station, the driver took the corners gingerly. The vehicle swayed, its high center of gravity threatening a rollover. But it stayed up.

公交车一路开往地铁站，司机拐弯时开得小心翼翼。车厢有些摇晃，强大的离心力似乎要将车身掀翻，但还是稳住了。

When, thankfully, we stepped off, I was irritated. I told my Chinese wife that overloading a bus like that created a public safety hazard. She upbraided me gently.

谢天谢地我们下车了，这时我有点愤怒。我告诉自己的中国媳妇，公交车超载这么多人会给公共安全带来隐患。她温和地反驳了我。

“This is normal in China,” she said sweetly. “There are a lot of people here. He is a good driver, trying to help as many people as he can.”

“在中国这是正常的，”她和气地说道。“有这么多人要坐公交。司机师傅车技过硬，自然希望能尽力帮助更多的人。”

When I continued my protest, she resorted to her wife voice: “If you don’t like it, go back to your own country.”

我继续向她抗议，但妻子拿出了家里领导的口吻：“如果你受不了，就回你自己的国家吧。”

Ohh-kayy. End of discussion. I know when I’m beaten.

哦，好吧，谈话到此结束。我知道自己输了。

Broadcaster

Randy Wright joined China Daily as an editor in 2013. His career spans 36 years and 10 newspapers in the United States in senior management, editorial writing and reporting roles. He served as adjunct faculty at the University of Arizona and has consulted for many publications, including the California Bar Journal for lawyers and judges. He is a licensed pilot in the US.