I am not suggesting that any of the following ideas will totally fix your mental and emotional pain from being single on Valentine’s day. I am suggesting they will help, probably more than you think. Resolve to try a few this year:
我不是在暗示以下的想法会完全治愈你作为单身狗过情人的、精神上和情绪上伤痛。我就是在建议,它们可能会比你想的更有治愈里。今年,就试试吧:
1.Watch movies that celebrate friendship rather than romance. Examples include the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Beaches, Friends With Money, Thelma and Louise, Mystic Pizza, Fried Green Tomatoes, Steel Magnolias, Boys on the Side, How to Make an American Quilt, and the Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood.
看一些歌颂”基友情”而不是“异性恋大好”的电影。举些例子,比如像《指环王三部曲》、《情比姊妹深》、《老友有钱》、《末路狂花》、《现代灰姑娘》、《油炸绿番茄》、《钢木兰花》、《潇洒有情天》、《恋爱编织梦》,还有《丫丫姐妹们的神圣秘密》。
2.Call an old friend just to say I love you. I love to do this when loneliness gets too much. If they answer, we always have a lovely chat. If they don’t, I leave a voicemail telling them I just called to say I love you.
打电话给一个老友,只为告诉他/她“我爱你哟~”。我喜欢在孤寂汹涌而来的时候这么做。如果他们接了电话,我们就长期拥有了一个孤单热线。如果他们没接,我会给他们留个语音留言,告诉他们,我打这个电话仅仅是为了说句“我爱你”。
3.Send Valentines in the mail or email to your close friends and family. You can go as fancy or simple as you like.
给你的好友和家人发送情人节短信或是邮件。你可以加入天马行空的想象,或是仅仅放你喜欢的。
4.Plan a beautiful, fabulous dinner for yourself – love of self is an important skill! I do recommend cooking at home or ordering in, splurging on a fancy dessert or expensive ingredient.
为你自己计划一次美好的、难以置信的晚餐——自爱是项很重要的技能!我十分推荐在家里自己做,或是叫餐,尽情享用精致的甜点,或是昂贵的配料!
5.Read famous letters between friends or books and poems that celebrate filial love. The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis examines the good and bad of different types of love from a Christian perspective.
读一些友人之间很有名的信件,或是书和诗歌来庆祝“子女对长辈的爱”。C.S.路易斯的《四种爱》从基督徒的角度审视了不同种类爱的好坏。
6.Replay failed relationships in your head, focusing on what you learned from it or why it’s a good thing they ended. In my experience, the fact that we are still single is often a good thing. Rather than romanticizing your exes, spend sometime on Valentine’s day reminding yourself why they sucked.
在你脑海中重复回放失败的感情经历,专注于你从中吸取的教训,或是它们无疾而终的好处。从我的经验来看,我们仍然单身,事实上是件好事。在情人节的某一时间提醒你们自己,为何你的前任们都糟透了,而不是浪漫化你的前任们。
7.Watch a performance or plan to attend a live show.
看一场表演,或是计划参加一场真人秀。
8.Write a list of everything and everyone you are grateful for in your life. Practicing gratitude is a simple exercise that can always help us feel better!
写一张清单,列上你生命中你感激的所有人和事。感激心情的练习非常简单,且能总能帮你感觉更好。
9.Schedule a professional massage. Often single people don’t get enough physical touch, skin-skin contact with another person. Regular professional massages can help offset the craving for human contact.
安排一次专业的按摩。通常单身狗们的肢体接触和肌肤相亲都太贫乏了!常规的专业按摩能够有助于填补人际交往的渴望。
10.Find an opportunity to do good for others on Valentine’s day. Giving to others usually pulls us out of our own funk. Consider volunteering at a soup kitchen, homeless shelter, or other service opportunities.
找一个机会在情人节帮助别人。为他人奉献常常能拉我们爬出恐惧的泥潭。想象一下在流动厨房、流浪汉庇护所里当志愿者,或是其他的服务机会。
I hope this post has inspired you to celebrate being single on Valentine’s day. If taking any of these steps seems overwhelming or like it won’t help at all, please consider seeking a professional counselor.
我希望这篇文章能激励起你庆祝一个人的情人节。如果其中的任何一个建议看上去用力过猛或是毫无用处,那就请咨询砖家吧……
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