躺枪否？17个证据你已成宇宙黄金剩斗士

A Warm Embrace

Feel like you've been single and ready to mingle for so long, you're deserving of some kind of endurance award?

感觉自己一直就是只单身狗，时刻为交往而准备着，真该给你颁发耐力奖了！

Hey, you just might be. Below, 17 signs you have officially out-singled all other single people in the universe.

嘿！可能你就是个单身狗，以下17项标准可以证明你比世界上所有的单身狗更单身。

Your idea of a warm embrace looks a little something like this.

你觉得温暖的拥抱貌似只能这副样子了。

Jealousy

You're jealous of these hand-holding gummy bears.

这些牵手的小熊橡皮糖都能招来你的羡慕妒忌恨。

No Emergency Contact

Your emergency contact is depressing. Real depressing.

你的紧急联系人郁闷了，真的郁闷了。

Fake Girlfriend

You go to the trouble of staging selfies with your fake girlfriend.

只好麻烦假女友登台配合自己演一出戏。

Don't Even Try To Fake

You don't even go to the trouble of faking a girlfriend anymore.

就连给自己伪装一个女友的麻烦都省了。

Aged To Much

You've aged decades in the time it's taken to find The One. (Hey, at least you'll always have dear old dad.)

找对象蹉跎了岁月。（嘿，还好有亲爱的老爸陪在身边。）

A Mess

This drawing accurately illustrates your "love life."

这幅画真切生动地展现了你的“爱情生活”。

No One Care

You realize nothing brings the boys to the yard. Not even milkshakes.

就别说准备好一杯奶昔等你了，家里连个人影儿都木有啊。

Mummy's Good Boy

Forget your mom. Even your Coke cans are starting to dole out unsolicited relationship advice.

别再做听妈妈话的乖孩子了！去主动争取自己的幸福吧。

Buy A Pillow

You give serious thought to buying this pillow.

你真该好好考虑买个这样的枕头。

Food Is Your True Love

You reinvent this romantic photo trend to incorporate your one true love: food.

为你的真爱（食物）拍一张纯浪漫的照片。

Chage Furniture

You swap out your old furniture for pieces more accommodating to your current living situation.

更换一下旧家具，增添一下现代生活气息。

Food Song

You start dedicating your favorite love songs to foodstuff.

边做美食边听那首自己最爱听的情歌。

In Love

You look for new creative ways to pretend you're soooo in love.

找个新创意伪装成你正沐浴爱河之中。

Date Food

Your "dinner with bae" posts on Instagram look something like this.

你发的搞笑进餐照片看起来是这个样子的。

Too Tired To Love

You've truly exhausted every last avenue in your attempt to find someone to date.

走在每一条大街上都盼着走个桃花运，最后却只剩下走得精疲力竭的自己而已。

Nutell Lover

Until finally, you just give up and accept Nutella as the love of your life.

最后，你放弃追求那憧憬的爱情生活，继续与巧克力过着甜蜜的爱情生活。