女人何必为难女人

If you were to believe the headlines in most newspapers, you would assume women do not like each other very much. Consider: “My female boss wouldn’t promote me because I’m pretty”; “A scheming harpy stole my man”; “I have no women friends because I like wearing short skirts”; and “Women hate me because I’m so beautiful”. The list goes on.

如果你相信大部分报纸上的资讯标题，就会认定女人都不太喜欢女人。想想以下这些说法吧：“我的女老板不提拔我，因为我漂亮”；“一个诡计多端的恶女人偷走了我的男人”；“我没有女性朋友，因为我喜欢穿短裙”；“女人恨我，因为我太美了”。如此等等。

I am a feminist, so I should deny that any of this goes on, right? I should believe women are amazing and we all support each other without question. We are paragons of virtue, models of kindness. The day I became a feminist was the day I realised that all those snide insinuations that we are our own worst enemies were just patriarchal nonsense designed to keep us down.

我是一个女权主义者，因此我应当否认这些现象的存在，不是吗？我应该相信，女性都很了不起，总是无条件地支持彼此；我们是道德典范、善心大使。自从我成为女权主义者的那天起，我就意识到，所有那些暗示“女人最大的敌人是她们自己”的说法，都是男权主义者们捏造出来的谎言，目的就是阻挡女性前进的脚步。

But there is some truth in both positions. Women can be cruel to each other Women can deliberately sabotage each other’s success. But the way this is interpreted – as the consequence of some innate female “cattiness” – ignores the position women are placed in from the moment they are born.

尽管我赞同女权主义的观点，但也承认现实的存在。现实中，女人对女人可能的确会很残忍，有些女人还会蓄意破坏其他女人的成功。但如果把这些现象解读为女性天生就“阴险”，那就忽视了一点——就是女人们在出生那一刻就被赋予的社会位置。

Women grow up being taught about what men have done through history. Male scientists, male mathematicians, male leaders – even when the peasants get involved, it is all about men. They see male politicians on the television talking to male journalists. They see men running around kicking, hitting, dunking balls. They read books and watch films where men take action and where women talk about men taking action.

女性在成长过程中得到的教育，都是有关男性是如何创造历史的。男性科学家、男性数学家、男性领导者...... 甚至连提到农民时，也主要是男性。她们在电视上看到的是男性政治家接受男性记者的采访。她们在运动场上看到男人在跑动、踢球、击球、扣篮。她们读的书、看的电影描述的都是男人在行动，女人出现时，也只是在谈论男人的行动。

When men still hold the reins, should we be surprised that women see other women as a threat, as potential usurpers of the male attention they need to succeed? It is clear where power lies – so is it any surprise when women know on which side their bread is buttered? Should we be surprised when this manifests itself in agreeing with the umpteenth man that his girlfriend does sound hysterical, whilst making it clear that you yourself are the picture of rationality? Should we be surprised when it manifests itself in resentment and jealousy of the few women who do manage to break through? In the playground, no one bullies the strong, they bully the weak. And the behaviour that sees women attacking each other illustrates that women still tend to lack power.

当男性依然处于控制地位时，女人将其他女人看作威胁、看作夺取男性注意力以便获得成功的潜在敌人，有什么好让人惊讶的？当权力在两性间的倾斜如此明显时，女人去依附能给她带来最大利益的人，有什么好让人惊讶的？当我们告诉第N个男人，他的女朋友的确有些歇斯底里，然后赶紧宣称我们自己通情达理，有什么好让人惊讶的？女人怨恨和嫉妒少数几个真正取得突破的女性，又有什么好让人惊讶的？在运动场上，没人欺负强者。女人彼此攻击，恰恰表明女性依然是弱者。

This resentment does not just arise over success – or at least, not traditional definitions of success. I recently ran a fairly high-profile feminist campaign to make sure at least one woman (other than the Queen or Britannia) was depicted on English banknotes. Happily, we won. But in the aftermath of that, I was subjected to a barrage of violent rape and death threats. The vast majority of women were supportive. They had been there, some of them said. And they had been ignored.

女人对女人的怨恨，并不仅仅针对那些获得成功的同类——起码并非仅仅是传统意义上的那种成功。比如，最近我组织了一次非常高调的女权运动，要求英国纸币上至少印有一名女性形象（除了女王之外）。令人欣慰的是，我们赢了。但之后我收到了一系列暴力和死亡威胁。大部分女性是支持我的。她们中的一些人说，也受到过类似攻击，却没人重视。

It was different for me. I was not ignored. Because of my campaigning, the media took an interest in the backlash that followed – and media pressure forced the police to investigate crimes that they had ignored when perpetrated against less high-profile women. This disparity led some of those women to take their resentment out on me. Rather than rail against a system that unfairly privileges certain women over others, they railed against a woman who had unfairly benefited from it.

但我的情况不同，我没有被忽视。因为我发起的运动，媒体对事后我受到的攻击产生了兴趣。迫于媒体压力，警方开始介入调查，而如果受到攻击的女性不那么引人注目，警方是不会理会那些罪行的。我的境遇好于其他女性，使得她们中的一些人迁怒于我。她们没把矛头指向那个不公平的、赋予其中一些女性“特权”的那个体系，却把矛盾指向了不公平地受益于这个体系的我。

Feminism has long ignored this issue – and with good reason. With women pilloried, misrepresented, and under-represented in public life, why would we give that culture more ammunition? Why would we give that culture more excuses for claiming that women are their own worst enemies – and that is why they have failed to achieve equality?

女权主义者一直以来都选择忽视这类现象，这不无理由。在公众生活中，女性仍然受到束缚、被曲解、没有足够的话语权。所以女人为何还要承认最大的敌人就是自己——所以我们无法取得真正的平等呢？这种说法看上去只会给男权文化找到更多借口，赋予它更大力量。

This reaction is understandable, but ultimately futile. More than this, it is damaging. If feminism keeps ignoring this issue, then it accepts the sexist narrative about why it arises. What we need to do instead is to acknowledge the anger and understand it. Until we stop brushing this issue under our copies of The Female Eunuch, it will never be resolved. Feminism will continue to fail women who have been so traumatised by growing up in a society that devalues them and threatens them with violence, that they fight back in the only way that feels safe: against each other.

这种反应是可以理解的，但最终是无益的，甚至是破坏性的。如果女权主义始终忽视这个问题，就相当于接受性别主义者对问题根源的解释。我们所需要做的就是，承认愤怒的存在并理解它。如果我们总是用一本《女太监》(The Female Eunuch，70年代出版的一本女权主义经典书籍——译者注)来解释所有的问题，那么它们就永远得不到解决，女权主义将继续让女性失望。在一个贬低女性价值、女性不时受到暴力威胁的社会中成长，女性受害已经如此之深，以至于只有一种回击方式能让她们感到安全，那就是为难其他女人。