中国剩女: 在传统与变革中艰难寻爱

Xu Jiajie has gone on countless blind dates and to numerous match-making events over the past five years in search of a husband.

在过去5年中，许佳洁（音译）为找到好一位丈夫参加了无数次相亲和婚恋活动。

At 31, the baby-faced office worker from Shanghai is under enormous pressure from family and friends to get married. But the right man is hard to find, she says, a big issue for urban, educated and well-paid Chinese women in a society where the husband's social status is traditionally above the wife's.

这位来自上海的上班族虽然已经31岁，却还是一张娃娃脸。谈到结婚问题，她表示正处于亲友的巨大压力之下。但许小姐说，传统的中国家庭中，丈夫的社会地位要高于妻子。对于高教育程度、高收入的城市女性来说，找到合适的男人实在太难了。

"My parents have introduced every bachelor they know," said Xu, who earns double the average wage in Shanghai. "Half of the bachelors I met are quiet and never go out. Outgoing men don't need blind dates."

许小姐的工资是上海市民平均收入的两倍，她说：“我的父母把他们认识的单身男子全都介绍给我，但在我见过面的单身汉中，有一半人十分内向，很少出门。常出门聚会的人不需要相亲。”

As couples celebrate the "Qixi" festival on Tuesday, the Chinese equivalent of Valentine's Day, Xu and millions of women like her face stark choices as long-held ideas about matrimonial hierarchy run up against economic and social changes sweeping the world's most populous country.

当一对对恋人周二欢度中国“七夕”情人节时，数以百万计的女性却和许小姐一样面临着艰难抉择。在这个全球人口最多的国家中，长久沿袭的婚姻等级制度正遭遇到席卷全国的经济社会剧变。

The term "shengnu" - directly translated as "leftover women" - was coined to refer to professional women who have not married by their late 20s.

社会上还流传着“剩女”一词，指的是那些将近30岁还没结婚的职业女性。

"Chinese people often think males should be higher in a relationship in every sense, including height, age, education and salary," Ni Lin, who hosts a popular match-making television show in Shanghai, told Reuters.

上海电视台著名相亲节目主持人倪琳告诉路透社记者：“中国人总认为在婚姻关系中，男性处处都要高女性一筹，包括身高、年龄、教育水平和工资收入。”

"This leads to a phenomenon in which A-grade men marry B-grade women, B-grade men marry C-grade women and C-grade men marry D-grade women. Only A-grade women and D-grade men can't find partners."

“这导致一等男人娶二等女人，二等男人娶三等女人，三等男人娶四等女人，只有一等女人和四等男人没人要。”

In Beijing, more than a third of women in their late 20s and 30s are looking for husbands, according to the dating website Jiayuan.com. Media reports say there may be as many as 500,000 "leftover women" in the capital.

婚恋交友网站“世纪佳缘”称，北京市三十岁上下的女性中，有超过三分之一的人还没有男朋友。有媒体报道说北京的“剩女”可多达50万。

There are plenty of men to go round among China's nearly 1.4 billion people but social status can conspire against single professional woman once again.

中国人口近14亿，想找个丈夫并不难，但考虑到社会地位，单身职业女性的选择就不那么多了。

China's population is more tilted towards men than in many countries due to the government's one-child policy and a cultural preference for boys. The latest census in 2011 showed there were twice as many single men born in the 1970s as women of the same age.

政府制定计划生育政策，中国文化传统又偏爱男孩，导致男性人口多于女性人口，男女比例之大比很多国家都严重。2011年的最新人口普查显示，20世纪70年代出生的同龄人中，单身男性的数量是单身女性的两倍。

But unlike "leftover women", these "shengnan" or "leftover men" often live in lower-tier cities and do not make much money.

但同“剩女”不一样，这些“剩男”往往住在二三线城市，挣的工资也不高。

The Shanghai city government tries to help women like Xu by arranging regular match-making events. One in May attracted 20,000 single men and women.

上海市政府定期举办相亲活动，帮助像许小姐一样的女性摆脱单身。曾有2万名单身男女参加了五月举办的婚博会。

Lucy Wang, a 32-year-old Chinese language teacher who attended the event, said all she could find were playboy types or momma's boys.

露西·王是一名32岁的汉语教师，她参加了相亲活动后说，见到的男性不是花花公子就是那些过分依赖妈妈的乖儿子。

"I sometimes wonder if there is something wrong with me," she said. "Twenty thousand people and yet I can't find anyone I like."

她说：“有时我都怀疑自己是不是有毛病，两万人中居然连一个我喜欢的人都找不到。”