象牙塔里的爱情禁忌

Universities are hotbeds for all kinds of relationships, from everlasting true love through to awkward one-night stands.

大学是各种恋情的温床，从永恒的真爱到尴尬的一夜情。

Relationships at uni are important; they make you grow up a lot. However, there are some kinds of relationships that you should steer clear of, because they tend to make you forget why you ever went to uni in the first place.

大学里的恋爱是重要的，它们能让你长大许多。然而，有几种恋情你应该避开，因为它们往往会让你一开始就忘记去大学的原因。

So freshers, I offer you my list of things not to do; third-years, hold your heads in shame if you've ever made these mistakes.

所以新生们，我给你们不该做的事情的清单；第三年，如果你曾经犯过这些错，那么在羞愧中抬起头。

1.Relationship with your lecturer

与老师恋爱

It's understandable that you'd be attracted to the person imparting wisdom and learning to you on a weekly basis. There are all too many occasions for attraction to blossom; seminars where everyone else is too hung over to turn up, or the aptly named "personal" tutorials.

你会被每周向你传授智慧和知识的人吸引这是可以理解的。有太多的场合为这种吸引开花；其他人玩得太疯而没有出现的研讨会，或掩人耳目的“个人”辅导。

Relationships between faculty members and students are pretty common, and rarely prohibited by universities; standard guidelines, such as these from Royal Holloway just require the relationship to be mentioned to the head of department.

教师和学生之间的恋情是相当常见的，很少被大学禁止。标准指南，如这些来自于皇家霍洛威学院的指南只需要将恋情向部门负责人提一下。

But (and I write this as the daughter of a student-staff relationship) most relationships you have at uni aren't going to end happily ever after. Most likely, if you get into a relationship with your tutor or lecturer, it will implode at some point, and you'll have to endure the awkwardness and pain.

但(我以一对师生恋的女儿的身份写这篇文章)你在大学的大多数恋爱不会从此圆满结束。最有可能的是，如果你和你的导师或讲师谈恋爱，它会在某个点爆发，你将不得不忍受尴尬和痛苦。

2. Relationship with your flatmate

与室友恋爱

This, thankfully, isn't a mistake I've made, much as I've tried. However, Katie, a friend from home, started seeing a flatmate at the beginning of this year. "We first got together on a night out, and then discovered that we both liked each other." It's a common situation.

值得庆幸的是，这不是我犯过的错，更像已经试过的。然而，凯蒂，一个来自家乡的朋友，今年开始与室友约会。“我们在晚上外出时第一次在一起，然后发现我们都喜欢对方。”这是常见的情况。

But, as Katie testifies, things can get rough. "I ended things, which is when the problems began. He still liked me, and even a few months later, he'd get really angry if I got with any other guys. I'd go to the kitchen to get breakfast, and he'd be waiting to tell me off."

但是，当凯蒂证明，事情可能会变得麻烦。“我做完事情，这才是问题的开始。他仍然喜欢我，甚至几个月后如果我和其他男人在一起他就会很生气。我去厨房做早餐，他会等在那数落我。”

Having a relationship with someone you already live with escalates everything; you can get close really quickly, but that makes it harder if you then split up. Katie says: "Don't do it – or at least wait until the summer if you want anything to happen."

和你同居的人谈恋爱让一切都恶化，你们可以更快亲近，但如果你们分手会使一切都很困难。凯蒂说：“不要这样做——或者如果你想发生什么事至少等到夏天。”

My experience also tells me that however spectacularly you get your heart broken, eventually it's okay. You listen to Taylor Swift a lot, write a semi-ironic newspaper article about it all, and finally reach the point where you can see your ex and be happy that you once had a good time together.

我的经验还告诉我，不管你如何高调地心碎，最终它会愈合。你经常听泰勒•斯威夫特，写一篇关于它的半嘲讽性的报纸文章，并最终到达某种程度，你可以见你的前任且你会因你们曾经有过一段美好时光而感到快乐。

Because uni is where you do stupid things that you think you'll regret forever, but actually, looking back, you realise that it was all properly, wonderfully brilliant.

因为大学是你做蠢事的地方，你认为你会永远后悔，但实际上，回首过去，你会意识到这都是正常的，非常精彩的。