In the not-so-distant past, being single was often a sign of failure. Many people considered single women lonely creatures who couldn't attract a man. Though some stigma still remains, research conducted by Kay Trimberger, a visiting scholar at the University of California at Berkeley, reveals that for all women, including singles, the intimacy of being in a couple is not a requirement for leading a fulfilling and successful life. There are other ways to find happiness.
在并不遥远的过去,“单身”是种失败的象征。“单身女性”就等同于“没有吸引力的孤独生物”。虽然现在仍存在类似偏见,但最近加州大学伯克利分校的访问学者Kay Trimberger开展的一项调查显示,对女性而言,是否单身和是否拥有一个充实而成功的人生并无关联。幸福可以有很多方式。
Step 1:Look at both the pros and cons of your situation.
第一步:审视自身环境中的优缺点。
You might be single by choice or by circumstance. You might feel you are missing out on some things, but remember that the grass is not always greener on the other side. Think about the strains a relationship entails, and how much freedom you have now. If you've been in unhappy relationships, compare your state now to your state then. Look at the good points of being single, without trying to pretend its all rosy.
也许你的单身是自己选择、抑或是环境使然。可能有时候你会觉得自己错过了一些东西,但请记得不要“这山望着那山高”。想想看吧,一段感情中有多少烦心事儿啊!而单身能给你最大的自由。假如你曾经历过数段不快乐的感情,请把自己当前的状态和曾经的状态做个比较。挖掘那些单身的闪光点,同时别假装曾经的那些感情生活只剩美好和浪漫。
Step 2:Stay socially active.
第二步:保持活跃的社交。
Being single means you probably need to make a bit more of an effort to socialize. Find friends at work or through activities you enjoy. Keep doing new things. Remember that being single, even choosing to remain single, doesn't mean you can't have romantic relationships in your life.
单身意味着你也许需要在社交活动上多花一些精力。找找从工作或活动中找找看有没有谈得来的朋友。要不停尝试新事物。记住:即使单身、即使打算保持单身,都不代表你的人生中从此就不能拥有浪漫。
Step 3:Re-evaluate your career.
第三步:重新评估你的事业。
When you're single, it's more important than ever to find satisfaction in your work. If you're not happy with your job, attempt to find a more fulfilling one. If that's not possible, look for other ways to find fulfillment, such as going back to school or volunteering. Find causes you're passionate about. Keep physically active. Think of everything you do as geared to feeling good about yourself and building and maintaining connections with other people.
单身的时候,工作中的满意度无疑很重要。假如你不喜欢自己的工作,那就去找个更好的。找不到也没关系,那就用别的事物来充实自己,比如回学校读书、或做志愿工作。找到那些能让你迸发热情的事情。保持身心活跃。把自己手头在做的任何事都想成能使你得到满足、并让你和他人建立良好关系的积极推动剂。
Step 4:Do things on your own.
第四步:独立行事。
While this might take some courage in the beginning, you might discover you like doing things alone. Don't let being single stop you from doing anything you want to do. For example, if you travel alone, look to meet new people on your travels. Buy a house on your own. According to ABC News, more than 1.7 million single women in the United States bought homes in 2010. Being single doesn't have to stop you from achieving your goals.
一开始也许需要些勇气,但很快你就会发现,原来自己喜欢独立行事的感觉。不要让“单身状态”阻挠你做自己想做的。举例:假如你想独自旅行,那就去旅途上认识天南海北的新朋友吧;或者给自己买套房子吧。根据ABC电视台的报道,截至2010年,全美有至少170万的单身女性独立买房。总之不要因为单身,而束缚了自己向目标前进的步伐哦。
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