不想为钱争吵?那就别再做这些事了

Jumping right to the big topics

直接谈论重大话题（金钱）

Although it's important to talk about money, jumping straight to the million-dollar question (which differs depending on the couple) is a huge hurdle to leap right away. Instead, Bressington recommends keeping the conversation light and short for the first couple of weeks. Focus on what the upcoming expenses are for the next week, and how well you both stuck to the previous week's plan. Once you get comfortable with that, start discussing more long-term goals, or why you each have the spending habits you do. 'Then you can start to build a solid money future,' Bressington says. And rest assured, money is one of those normal fights that even happy couples have.

尽管谈钱很重要，但直接跳到数百万美元的问题（因情侣而异）却是你应该跳过的巨大障碍。相反，布雷辛顿建议，刚开始的几个星期，可以聊些轻松、简短的话题。重点关注下周的开支、以及上周计划的执行情况。一旦适应谈有关金钱的话题，你们就可以讨论更多的长期目标，或者聊聊你们的消费习惯为何如此。"之后你们就开始建立稳定的金钱未来，"布雷辛顿说道。放宽心，每对幸福的情侣都为金钱吵过架，很正常。

Sharing every penny

分享每一分钱

Most financial advisors give joint bank accounts a big thumbs up. After all, 'it fosters openness and teamwork' when couples share responsibility for the household income, says Matt Bell, blogger and author of Money & Marriage: A Complete Guide For Engaged and Newly Married Couples. But sharing every penny can also lead to secrets, distrust, and blame between partners, especially if they have different spending habits and personalities.

很多财务顾问都觉得联合银行账户是个好主意。毕竟，当情侣共同分担家庭收入的责任时，'它能促进公开和团队精神'，博主、《金钱与婚姻：为订婚和新婚夫妇定制的完整指南》（Money & Marriage: A Complete Guide For Engaged and Newly Married Couples）一书的作者马特·贝尔说道。但分享每一分钱会导致情侣之间存在秘密、不信任和相互责怪，尤其是当他们有着不同消费习惯和个性的时候更是如此。

To avoid those fights, Bressington recommends setting aside a certain amount of money for each partner to spend on whatever they want-no questions asked. This gives the couple some freedom to spend on themselves, sans guilt (and fights!). Here are even more surprising secrets of the most happily married couples.

为避免这些争吵，布雷辛顿建议每个人留一笔钱购买自己想要的东西--另一方不得过问。这样既赋予情侣一定程度的消费自由，又不会让他们感到愧疚（也不会为此争吵！）。这里还有更多关于最幸福夫妇的秘密，令人吃惊哦。

Letting one person handle the budget

让一个人管钱

Whether you have a one-income household or both are wage-earners, having just one partner manage the household budget is a big no-no. Not only can it leave one-half of the relationship in the dark when it comes to expenses, but it can also lead to misunderstanding and distrust between the couple. 'Many fights are based on at least one party simply not knowing or not understanding-sometimes it's both parties,' Bressington says. 'Establish a base level of understanding, and the fights subside.' Still, 'it can be helpful to divvy up the financial responsibilities,' Bell says.

不管你家挣钱的是一个人还是两个人，让一个人管钱可是不行的。这不仅会让你们的关系在谈到开支时处于黑暗，而且还会导致情侣间的误解和不信任。'很多争吵都是因为一方不知道或不理解--有时候双方都不知道或不理解造成的，'布雷辛顿说道。'建立基本的信任，争吵就会平息。'但，'分担财务责任可能会带来帮助，'贝尔说道。