In this age of Internet chat, videogames and reality television, there is no shortage of mindless activities to keep a child occupied.
在这个充斥着网聊,电子游戏与真人秀的时代,并不缺乏让小孩子沉迷的玩物。
Yet, despite the competition, my 8-year-old daughter Rebecca wants to spend her leisure time writing short stories.
尽管有着这些诱惑,我8岁的女儿Rebecca,却希望花时间写写小故事。
She wants to enter one of her stories into a writing contest, a competition she won last year.
她打算将其中一个作品拿去比赛-------一个去年她获胜的比赛。
As a writer I know about winning contests, and about losing them.
作为一名作家,我十分了解写作比赛中赢和输意味着什么。
I know what it is like to work hard on a story to receive a rejection slip from the publisher.
我知道,当辛辛苦苦写完一个故事却遭到出版社的拒绝是一种什么样的心情;
I also know the pressures of trying to live up to a reputation created by previous victories.
我也知道,要维护从前的成功所带来的声望需要承受多么大的压力。
What if she doesnt win the contest again?
加入女儿这次赢不了比赛会怎么样呢?
Thats the strange thing about being a parent. So many of our own past scars and dashed hopes can surface.
作为父母,这是无比奇怪的事情。我们以往的很多伤痕和破碎的梦想会慢慢浮现出来。
A revelation came last week when I asked her, Dont you want to win again? No, she replied, I just want to tell the story of an angel going to first grade.
知道上星期,我得到了启示。我问她:你想再赢一次吗?不女儿回答,我只想告诉大家一个天使上一年级的故事
I had just spent weeks correcting her stories as she spontaneously told them.
我其实已经花了好几个星期在女儿不自觉地讲述时修正她的故事。
Telling myself that I was merely an experienced writer guiding the young writer across the hall.
我告诉自己,这无非是一个有经验的作家在引导一个新作家而已。
I offered suggestions first grade was quickly guided by me into the tale of a little girl with a wild imagination taking her first music lesson.
我给了她不少建议,关于角色,冲突以及故事的结局,在我的指引下,这个原本讲小天使担惊受怕地开始念一年级的故事,很快变成了一个充满丰富想象力的女孩开始第一节音乐课的历程。
I had turned her contest into my contest without even realizing it.
在我不经意时,我已经把她的比当成了自己的比赛。
Staying back and giving kids space to grow is not as easy as it looks.
放手给孩子空间成长不想看起来那么简单。
Because I know little about farm animals who use tools or angels who go to first grade. 因为我对能用工具的农场动物,或者一年级的小天使一无所知。
I had to accept the fact that I was co-opting my daughters experience.
我不得不承认我借用了女儿的经历。
While steeping back was difficult for me, it was certainly a good first step that I will quickly follow with more steps, putting myself far enough away to give her room but close enough to help if asked.
尽管对于我来说放手不容易,但可喜的是,这回是一个好的开端,我很快可以学会更多,给自己一段合适的距离,既可以让女儿有发展的空间,同时在她需要时施以援手。
All the while I will be reminding myself that children need room to experiment , grow and find their own voices.
在这个过程中,我会一直提醒自己,孩子需要空间去尝试,去找到属于自己的路。
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