考研英语待批改作文:
Dear Manager,
When I read your advertisement in the newspaper,I really have passion to apply a position of Technical Director.
Its a giant challenge to put my technical knowledge into practice.
There have two reasons for this application as follow.First of all,I have six_year experience as an Assistant Technical Director
in an international company,which made me could deal with different technical problems as soon as possible.
Secondly,as a graduate student who finished technical program in a specialization college,I have a large number of technical certifications.
There have a strong ambition in my mind,pushing me want to work for your company as an Technical Director.
I attached my resume as below,please read.I will be appreciated if you can give me an interview.Looking forward to your reply.
Thank you very much!
Yours faithfully,
Li Ming.
考研英语作文批改点评如下:
Dear Manager,
When I read your advertisement in the newspaper, I really have passion to apply a position of(改成for,apply for) Technical Director.Its a giant challenge to put my technical knowledge into practice. There have two reasons for this application as follow. First of all, I have six_year(six-year) experience as an Assistant Technical Director in an international company, which made me could deal with different technical problems as soon as possible.Secondly, as a graduate student who finished technical program in a specialization college, I have a large number of technical certifications. There have a strong ambition in my mind, pushing me want(去掉,pushing可以表达此意)to work for your company as an(应该用a) Technical Director.I attached my resume as(去掉)below, please read. I will be appreciated if you can give me an interview. Looking forward to your reply.Thank you very much!(这一部分去掉) Yours faithfully,
Li Ming. 点评:6分最后一段简洁结尾即可。中间的部分是文章的主题,第二条内容有点空。语言表达能力有待加强。
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