考研英语作文批改范例17

　　Dear sir, 　　As I am a student who can stand by myself, I am writing to request if you can assist me to 　　find a student who need help . 　　I wonder whether it is convenient for you if two things regarding the child taken into account. 　　First, the child shou come from Yushu where suffer from the disaster badly. Second, it will be better 　　if he is a primary school student ,so I can support by myself . 　　I woud like to gei him my assistance until he gratuates from college. Your attention to my inquiry 　　would be highly apprieciated. Your sinerely , 　　Li Ming点评：5分 　　你基本上理解了题目要求，但是文章结构不尽合理，层次不够清晰，你就写成三段即可，或者两段。这样层次比较清晰，可能是由于具体的段落格式的问题，现在这样，感觉很乱，一个意群要放在一起。注意拼写错误，写完之后一定要检查一下，看有没有这种错误。注意后面署名的格式问题。课后多看看范文，学习结构安排和语言表达方面的技巧。加油啊。