一说起英文写作问题,中国学生就特别头疼,也很难在短时间内得到有效和实质上的提高。课堂上老师给予学生的,只能是模板性的框架结构,结果弄得很多学生一写作文就以相似的方式开头。其实要提高应试类写作,除去特别的技巧,修炼内功是关键。这个关键说到实处,就是两个方面,中文思维和英文翻译,如果一个学生在考试或是写任何其想要写的文章的时候,能够合理而有逻辑地产生中文思维并且用较好的表达方式翻译成英文,那么无论是什么应试类写作,都能够克服恐惧的障碍,甚至取得高分。
首先是中文思维。看到一个题目,不管是雅思,托福,赛达还是其他,一定会有对应题目的写作思路,这个思路,或者是整体框架,其实是很快就能把握的。议论文无非就是引入话题展开分析总结观点。在写作过程中,学生一定是先形成中文的思路或是语言,然后再去翻译。本文的重点不在如何练习和培养写作思路和逻辑,因为这个问题因人而异,每个人对待一个问题的思考深度和角度会相差很多,也不是老师在一朝一夕内可以解决的。我们能做的,就是引导学生,让他们用正确合理的语言,表达他们要表达的观点,前提是不要偏题。
本文的重点在于在形成了一定的中文思路以后,如何把一篇平淡的文章写得相对出色。这就涉及到翻译的问题。在我看来,中国学生的写作,初级阶段都应该是中文构思加翻译。翻译是有技巧的,在写作过程中,通常分为以下几个方面:
确立句子主干结构写作法
横向多变性句型
纵向多变性词汇
增加成分写长句子升级
押韵
确立句子主干
在这里我提出结构写作的概念,也就是说一个长句子,无论字数多少,一定只有一个骨干,即主谓宾,因此在写作的时候,先在脑海里形成这样的骨架是写句子的基础,比如:
英语作为全球语言是目前世界最瞩目的现象之一。 English, as a global language, is presently one of the most remarkable phenomena worldwide.
这句话的主干是:英语是现象。对于大部分学生,很快就能够写出:English is a phenomenon.
然后,工作就是增加成分。
英语是目前世界最瞩目的现象之一。English is presently one of the most remarkable phenomena worldwide.
最后才是as部分,这个部分不是句子的主体,因为在形成句子整体框架的时候,应该放在最后考虑。
再来看一个稍微难一点的例子2:
当老俞带着低沉的调子和诡异的表情讲出那个笑话的时候整个教室爆发出爆笑。
这个句子的主干是整个教室发出爆笑:The whole class burst out laughing/broke into /burst into a great laughter
当什么时候The whole class burst out laughing/broke into /burst into a great laughter when Laoluo uttered the story.
怎么样的with his low tone and weird look
关键是这个部分放在那里,第一种可以放在整个句子后面。更好的是:The whole class burst out laughing/broke into /burst into a great laughter when Laoyu, with his low tone and weird look, uttered the story.
这样的顺序改变,增加了句子的顿挫感和平衡性。
例3:当城市化的脚步伴随高楼林立工业扩展进入农村,农村的宁静正在慢慢地被打破。
首先句子主干是:农村的宁静正在慢慢被打破。The peace of the countryside is generally being broken
当什么时候The peace of the countryside is generally being broken when the pace of the urbanization, When the pace of the urbanization spreads/expands/sprawls over into the regional area.
怎样的with skyscrapers of all shapes set up and the industries of all sorts roaring up.
于是这句话可以写成:The peace of the countryside is generally being broken /when the pace of the urbanization, with skyscrapers of all shapes set up and the industries of all sorts roaring up, spreads / expands/sprawls over into the regional area.
例4:武术被认为是中国传统文化的最有魅力的代表之一,因为一个很简单的原因,它总是激发了人们关于中国古代侠客刀光剑影的生活的想象。
Kong-fu is frequently referred to be one of the most enchanting symbols of Chinese culture
为什么for the simple reason
什么原因激起江湖的想象:it intrigues/arouses the fantasy concerning the cowboy life of ancient times:
什么江湖50-foot vertical leaps, running on the wind, jumping from rooftop to rooftop as well as shooting electricity from their fingers, to name a few.
横向变换句型
一个句子可以有多种表达,因此在练习和考试的时候,我们应该选择好的表达方式。横向变换就是改变句子的结构。
比如,上海位于中国东南沿海,是中国经济的领头羊。 Bellwether
这句话分别有十种以上的表达:
Shanghai is located in the east of China and is the leader/ bellwether of the national economy.
Shanghai is located in the east of China, which is the leader of the national economy.
Shanghai, located in the east of China, is the leader of the national economy.
Located in east of China, Shanghai is the leader of the national economy.
In the east of China is located Shanghai, the leader of the national economy.
Its in the east of China that is located Shanghai, the leader of the national economy.
It is Shanghai, the leader of the national economy, that is located in the east of China.
上述的语法,无非涉及定语从句,强调句,同位语,分词伴随,很多同学懂得这些,却很少把它们用到写作中去。
纵向变换单词
纵向变换就是变换句子中可以变换的单词,用高级的方式呈现,比如:
Be located可以由以下几个词替换:Stand/sit/nest/lie/is situated/ perch栖息
其中,nest/perch体现了画面感,于是要讲到在写作中不是越复杂高级的词语越好,用一些简单的词也能表达很有形象的画面,这些词多数会是名词,因为它们的画面感,比如:
Dragon over 盘亘
Crane for 好奇
wolf over 狼吞虎咽
Snake along 蜿蜒
写长句
中国学生的句子总是很短,逗号巨多。如何表达一个清晰干净的长句子其实是建立在中文内容的基础上的,如果用中文想不出要表达的内容等于白搭。通常写长句是建立在主干基础上的,一个句子只有一个S V O 在成分之间增加内容是写长句的方式:
S 1 2V Q3
一般情况下,在主语和宾语后面,都可以增加的成分就是同位语,分词和定语从句来修饰名词,在1和3后面。
University education, one of the most important periods in our growth, offers us a wealth of knowledge.
Advertisement, regarded to be one of the most indispensable communication channels in the 21st century, can bring us a great deal of useful information.
2的位置可以放入插入语,通常的插入语有很多,主要集中在:
程度类:To a large extent/to some extent
转这类: however
关系类:directly or indirectly
在加入成分后我们把上面的例句改写如下:
Shanghai, located in the east of China, is the leader/driving force of the national economy,which has, to a large extent, made great contributions to the prosperity of China.
如果还有想写的,可以在定语从句中增加内容
Shanghai, located in the east of China, is the leader/driving force of the national economy,which has, to a large extent, made great contributions to the prosperity of China and build up the national strength in this competitive world.
押韵
对于高级学生,在掌握大量词汇和对英文特别有感觉的基础上,可以选择押韵的词语。
Located in the east of China, Shanghai, an exterior knight and interior poet, is the leader of economic development of China.
外表的武士,内心的文人。
He is a man who always talks the talk but never walks the walk.
言行不一。
Smile a smile
Dream a little dream
Whiter than white
A little more than kin, and less than kind.---Helmet Act1 Scene 2
不亲不淡的关系。
Measure for measure
一报还一报。
Alls Well That Ends Well
皆大欢喜。
Loves Labours Lost
空爱一场。
Forever love is, no matter lover leaves.
两情若是久长时又岂在朝朝暮暮。
不管是什么考试,只要形成一定的中文思维,学生们只要掌握如何翻译的技巧就基本可以把自己内心的话写出来。因此去背模板和范文根本不是长久之计,就算以后出国写论文也没有自己的想法。所以要提高写作,同学们只能从理解如何把一个中文句子正确的,合理的,并且尝试用更好的表达方式写出来开始,慢慢锻炼自己的翻译能力,确立主干,横向和纵向选择好的句子结构和词汇,充实内容,如果可能选择押韵的词语。长期练习,不但对应试写作有很大帮助,也能锻炼自己的综合写作能力。
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