写作进阶提升之五 ——教你如何行文及润色
写作进阶提升 五个步骤 1、审题 (文体、主题、内容、人称、时态) 2、提炼要点,思考关键词 3、紧扣要点,连词成句 4、连句成文: ①主语和谓语 ②背景(增加时间、地点条件等) ③逻辑关系 ④开头与结尾 5、检查修改,规范抄写 ⑤语篇衔接
Some students think it is not good for people to keep pets in cities, because it will cause pollution to our environment. And the pets always make a noise that will disturb others.
However, others think we should see the positive aspects of keeping animals. It is very necessary for the lonely old people to have company and pets can be a good choice. If we can get on well with the animals, it will enrich our life, too.
I think if we really love animals, we needn’t show our love to them by keeping them, because the pets are not free and it’s not fair to the animals. If we donate the money used in keeping pets to some animal organizations, it will be more helpful to the animals.
(By Dong Shuoyi)
Some say that dogs make a big noise in the community, and sometime they even hurt people. Besides, animal drops also pollute the environment. They don’t agree to have pets in cities.
Although I admit all the disadvantages they mentioned, compared to the highlights, pets bring such shortcomings seem to be as small as a pencil tip.
As we see, a lovely kitty always keeps the old in company. It may bring good health to the old, as well as joy. And nowadays the harmonious society is being constantly promoted. We humans should live with animal friends in harmony as well. Only in this way can we make our earth a paradise for all the living.
So, choose an animal friend and be a friend to animals.
(By Zhuang Chenxi) 1.增加较复杂的句子结构
2.使用丰富的词汇 3.适当运用结构词和关联词:
however, therefore, thus, after a while,
all of a sudden, at last, as a result, in fact 等, 使句子 更为流畅。
As far as I am concerned, I strongly hold the opinion that this plan should be carried out continually not only because it gives us more space to develop our critical thinking and independent ability but also because we really feel much happier than ever before.
书面表达注意事项
My parents praised Ah Fu warmly. It had bravely saved my little sister.
My parents praised Ah Fu warmly. It was our brave Ah Fu who had bravely saved my little sister.
I met an old friend in the street. The street was very crowded.
I met an old friend in the street, which was very crowded. We can make progress in English only in this way. Only in this way can we make progress in English.
(1) 强调句 (2) 倒装句 (3) 复合句 (4) 介词短语
My mother sat in a chair with a newspaper in her hand.
My mother sat in a chair. There was a newspaper in her hand.(with 复合结构)
She left and did not say goodbye.
She left without saying goodbye. (5) 分词短语
Satisfied with the result, he decided to go on with a new experiment.
He was satisfied with the result, so he decided to go on with a new experiment.(分词做状语) 并列and; as well as ; also;
选择or; either—or;
or else; otherwise 原因because ; owing to; due to ;on account of ; thanks to 结果so ; therefore ; thus ; as a result
时间when ;soon after ; before; later ; first ; and then ; next ;
finally ; afterwards. 比较on the contrary ; on the other hand ; like
转折but ; yet; however ; although; in spite of ; instead ;
递进besides ; moreover ; even ; in addition
举例for example/instance; such as ; that is ; namely
;
总结after all
;
in short ; in general ; generally speaking
语篇衔接的过渡词语 润色提升示例
你的英国朋友正在做一个课题;世界各地的生日庆祝方式。他请你介绍中国学生过生日的方式。请你根据以下要点写一篇短文: 一、通常方式 1.生日聚会 2.生日礼物 3.生日祝福 二、我认为更有意义的庆祝方式和理由
*词数100-120
17
29 即时训练 书面表达(满分30分)
你班同学参加了 “二十一世纪中学生英文报组织的一场讨论。 讨论的主题是: 城市内是否可以豢养宠物(狗和猫)。请你根据下表所提供的信息,用英语给报社投稿,介绍讨论情况, 并说明自己的观点和建议。 反对饲养宠物的同学认为 支持饲养宠物的同学认为 1.造成环境污染 1.安慰孤寡老人 2.吵闹声,甚至伤人 2.人与动物和谐相处,增添生活情趣 注意:1.信的开头已为你写好; 2. 词数100左右。 Recently we have had a heated discussion on whether people should keep pets at home in cities.
饲养宠物
keep pets 污染环境
pollute the environment 吵闹声,甚至伤人 be
noisy and may even attack people 安慰孤寡老人
give lonely elderly people comfort 和谐相处
live in harmony with 增添生活情趣
add fun to ….
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