奇葩排行：2016年最没用的“自助类”书籍

Reading is good! Sadly, most books are bad. Especially in the self-help genre, which encourages simplistic ideas dressed up to sound profound, inept writing, plus all sorts of gimmicks trotted out to push titles onto best-seller lists and keep them there as long as possible.

阅读自然是好事。不尽如人意的是，大多数书都是鸡肋，特别是那些“自助”流派的书，只是把些毫无深度的想法包装一下，听起来言之凿凿实却空洞无用。这些教人华而不实技巧的书，还跻身了“最受欢迎书单”，这样就能 “永垂不朽”？！

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson

《不要对生活中的细枝末节太在意：不要随大流就能过好的生活》 作者：Mark Manson

Says the guy who wrote a fucking book and put an asterisk in the word "fuck."

然而作者本人却写了一整本的细枝末节，还把关键词“fuck”加上了星号。

Think Better, Live Better: A Victorious Life Begins in Your Mind by Joel Osteen

《学会思考，生活更美好：人生赢家从改变思想开始》 作者：Joel Osteen

[Inspirational megachurch voice]: All you gotta do to LIVE better… is THINK better! [Woman collapses on stage, is healed]

（想象教会中那种激励人心的声音）：你想要生活得更好... 那就是要学会思考。（女人们在舞台上摔倒，然后被治好了）

The Universe Has Your Back: Transform Fear to Faith by Gabrielle Bernstein.

《全宇宙都是你的靠山：将畏惧转化信念》 作者：Gabrielle Bernstein

Oh, well if you're on The Universe's list, step right on in, there's loads of trust fund money and mimosas by the pool on your left.

好吧，如果你在宇宙的清单上，请上前一步，在你的左手边的泳池边有一大堆信托基金和橙味香槟酒。

Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans

《设计你的生活：怎样生活得更美好、更愉快》 作者：Bill Burnett, Dave Evans共同编写

Life is nice, but the user experience leaves something to be desired. This book is the poor man's version of "learn to code," and is based on a Stanford class, so it must be good.

生活挺好的，只是需要做点用户体验层面的优化。这本书就是穷人版的“学会编码”，而且还是基于斯坦福的一门课程，所以肯定是本好书对不对？

You are a Badass: A totally inappropriate self-affirming adult coloring book (Volume 2) by Jen Sincero

《你是一个混蛋：一本自我肯定到完全不合时宜的成人涂色书（卷二》）作者：Jen Sincero

No, you're an adult who bought a coloring book. Though "totally inappropriate" is unintentionally accurate.

不，你是一个成年人，却买了本涂色书。“完全不合适”这样无意的措辞正好描述购买这本书的的成年人。

Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade by Robert Cialdini

《如何说服：用革命性的新方法来影响和说服别人》 作者:Robert Cialdin

Apparently the secret to persuading someone of something, anything, is the critical moment before you start your pitch. Oh. Who knew? No joke: The Amazon blurb says you can use these techniques for "online marketing campaigns and even effective wartime propaganda." Goebbels says, "I love this book!"

很显然，在开始你的说教之前，要说服谁，说服的时机是至关重要的。好吧，谁知道呢？讲真：亚马逊在宣传上说，本书中的技巧不但可以用于线上的营销，甚至在战争期间也能用来搞演说。戈培尔（德国纳粹时期演说家）说：“我爱这本书”

Radical Beauty: How to Transform Yourself from the Inside Out by Deepak Chopra and Kimberly Snyder

《你本来就很美：让你由内而外的蜕变》 作者：Deepak Chopra , Kimberly Snyder 共同编写

Welp, Deepak Chopra's writing about beauty now. Somebody has to stop this guy, he's printing money with all the pseudo-scientific bullshit he puts his name on these days.

天啊，Deepak 还开始写关于美的话题了。这年头，他用伪科学跟胡言乱语骗钱，还自己冠名，哪位仁兄快阻止他！

The Seventh Sense: Power, Fortune, and Survival in the Age of Networks by Joshua Cooper Ramo

《第七感：网络时代的权利、财富和生存》 作者Joshua Cooper Ramo

Sooooo this book promises to reveal why terrorists are successful? And also investors? And CEOs and generals? Turns out these people can see and feel "networks." Huh. Spoiler: This book also reveals that Bruce Willis has been alive the whole time.

所以这本书会揭示恐怖主义为什么会阴谋得逞？还有投资者们、CEO们、领导人们？这本书告诉我们，上述这些人可以感知“网络”。剧透：这本书还会告诉我们布鲁斯•威利斯一直都活着

Hustle: The Power to Charge Your Life with Money, Meaning, and Momentum by Neil Patel, Patrick Vlaskovits, and Jonas Koffler

《拼命挣钱：用金钱、意义与动力来为你的人生充电》 作者：Neil Patel, Patrick Vlaskovits, Jonas Koffler.

Self-help and get-rich-quick schemes are inextricably linked.

自助总是毫无悬念地和快速致富联系在一起。

Shaken: Discovering Your True Identity in the Midst of Life's Storms by Tim Tebow

《动摇：在生活的风暴中发现真实的自己》 作者：Tim Tebow

Technically not self-help, but aren't all Tim Tebow books some kind of self-help? And how are there MULTIPLE Tim Tebow books?

从技术角度来说，这本不属于“自助”范畴，不过不是所有的Tim Tebow书都是自助系列么？怎么会有这么多的Tim Tebow 的书？（橄榄球四分卫，水果姐前男友）

Spark Joy: An Illustrated Master Class on the Art of Organizing and Tidying Up by Marie Kondo《Spark Joy》

《整理清洁之术，大师级实操展示》 作者：Marie Kondo

The author of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up offers an illustrated guide for those readers left confused by the "don't keep so much freaking stuff" message of her revolutionary first title.

作者之前写过《怦然心动的人生整理魔法》，但那本书是告诉读者不要买那么多东西，读者们真的很费解，于是现在她出了本带图的指南。

TED Talks: The Official TED Guide to Public Speaking by Chris Anderson

《TED 演讲：TED公共演讲官方指南》 作者：Chris Anderson

Haven't we had enough TED Talks?

难道我们的TED演讲还不够多么？

It's All Easy: Delicious Weekday Recipes for the Super-Busy Home Cook by Gwyneth Paltrow

《这一切都很简单：给那些超忙家庭的居家食谱，工作日也能吃到的美餐》

OK, this is actually a pretty good troll.

好吧这确实是非常的有用处。

Self Made: Becoming Empowered, Self-Reliant, and Rich in Every Way by Nely Galán

《自己动手：让你变得干劲满满、自立根生、盆满钵满》

"For readers of #GIRLBOSS and viewers of Shark Tank." Yikes. "Rich in every way" mostly means "rich in money," if you couldn't guess.

对于那些《年轻女老板》的读者和《真人秀：创智赢家》的观众来说，呀，各个方面的“富有”就是指“金钱上的富有”，这个应该没人猜不出来。

The Sustainable Edge: 15 Minutes a Week to a Richer Entrepreneurial Life by Ron Carson and Scott Ford

《可持续的优势：每周15分钟变成更加富有的企业家》 作者：Ron Carson, Scott Ford

There's "rich" again. In just 15 minutes!

“致富”又来了，只要15分钟哦！

Sprint: How to Solve Big Problems and Test New Ideas in Just Five Days by Jake Knapp, John Zeratsky, and Braden Kowitz

《冲刺：5天内教你解决大问题，验证新想法》 作者：Jake Knapp, John Zeratsky, and Braden Kowitz

Fantastic, I look forward to hearing about the resolution to Hilbert's eighth problem. This book was written by three dudes. Excuse me, three PARTNERS AT GOOGLE VENTURES.

太棒了，我正好洗耳恭听希尔伯特第八个问题的解答。这本书的作者有3个家伙，啊不好意思，是3个谷歌风投的合伙人。

The Power of Broke: How Empty Pockets, a Tight Budget, and a Hunger for Success Can Become Your Greatest Competitive Advantage by Daymond John

《破产的力量：囊中羞涩、预算紧缩、急于求成，都可以成为成就你成功的最大优势》 作者：Daymond John

It must not be THAT powerful, because this book is about becoming and staying rich.

也没有那么“有力量”吧，因为这本书还是在教你摆脱贫穷。

The Code of the Extraordinary Mind: 10 Unconventional Laws to Redefine Your Life and Succeed on Your Own Terms by Vishen Lakhiani

《解密最强大脑：10条打破常规的法则，重新定义你的生活，实现个人成功》 作者：Vishen Lakhiani

Praise must be heaped on "personal growth entrepreneur" Vishen Lakhiani for creating the Platonic ideal of a self-help book in 2016. This one has it all: a call-out to "coding," hints at disruption, an appeal to the unconventional in the relentlessly banal, the steadfast belief that someone reading a self-help book truly can make his mind extraordinary, "laws," references to both "evolutionary biology" and "modern spirituality," reliance on "computational thinking," and, of course, success, which means money. This book is a green juice at a sober dance party hosted by Snapchat sponsored by UNIQLO and DJed by Avicii, that's how zeitgeisty it is.

“个人成长企业家”Vishen Lakhiani 书中所创造的柏拉图式理想应该在2016年的自助书界备受赞誉。它具备（“自助”流派书的）所有特质：“解密”，暗示着秘密解开，从传统平庸中解脱出来，对于那些执迷“自助”书籍的读者有着魔力，他们认定通过阅读此书必能让他们的大脑变得无与伦比。“定律”有着“进化生物学”和“现代精神”结合之意，基于“计算思维”，当然，还有成功意味着有钱。该书就像由快拍主持，优衣库赞助，艾维奇担任DJ的清醒舞会上的一杯绿色果汁。