考研英语小作文批改投诉信5-7分例文2

　　考研英语待批改作文：

　　5-7分

　　第二篇

　　Dear Sir or Madam,

　　I am a buyer of your online store and I bought a mobile phone last week. I feel bad to trouble you but I am afraid that I have to make a complaint about some problems after I use it during a short period of time.

　　The reason for my dissatisfaction is that it is unconvenience to use it and I cannot stand it. In the first place, the buttery needs recharging after using mere four hours, and I must take my charger with me when I go out for a while. In addition, the buttom are too small that it is nearly difficult to type anything with them. Under these circumstances, I find it so hard to use it in my daily life.

　　I appreciate it very much if you could change my phone for another new one that works well, preferably receive a refund for it, and I would like to have this matter settled by you within a week.

　　Thank you for your consideration and I will be looking forward to your reply.

　　Yours sincerely,

　　Li Ming

　　考研英语作文批改点评如下：

　　Dear Sir or Madam,

　　I am a buyer of your online store and I bought a mobile phone last week. I feel bad to trouble you but I am afraid that I have to make a complaint about some problems after I use(改为using) it during a short period of time.

　　The reason for my dissatisfaction is that it is unconvenience (改为inconvenient)to use it and I cannot stand it. In the first place, the buttery needs recharging after using(加for) mere four hours, and I must take my charger with me when I go out for a while. In addition, the buttom(拼写错误，导致我不清楚你要表达的意思) are too small that it is nearly difficult to type anything with them. Under these circumstances, I find it so hard to use it in my daily life.

　　I appreciate it very much if you could change my phone for another new one that works well, preferably receive a refund for it, and I would like to have this matter settled by you within a week.

　　Thank you for your consideration and I will be looking forward to your reply.

　　Yours sincerely,

　　Li Ming

　　6分

　　同学你好，标点符号与后面的单词要空一格。建议你写完作文后再检查一遍，如果仅仅是因为拼写错误，造成老师对整篇作文的理解出现偏差，最终影响分数是得不偿失的。