父母为我们付出了很多,你又做过哪些事情来表达自己的感恩之情呢?某英文报纸就感恩主题进行征文,请你投稿。描述你为父母做过的一件事,并谈谈你的感受。
提示词语:grow up, show ones gratitude (表示感激), something special
One possible version:
Theres no doubt that parents have given me a lot since I was born. With their care, I grow up happily. So I think it is necessary to do something special for them to show my gratitude. Both of my parents love music. So it would be a great idea to buy a wonderful CD for them. Last Sunday, I went to a bookstore and chose one among the top 10.
While we were having dinner together, I played the CD. It was beautiful. With great joy, they gave me a warm hug and a big smile. I felt very sweet. I was really proud that I did something for my parents. Their smiles were the best encouragement for me. I made up my mind to do things like this more often.
范文讲解:
审题要点:1.翻译中文提示,引出话题感激。 2.描述一件事。 3.谈感受
注意:英文提示词尽量都用上,已用红色表示出来。
一. 开篇翻译提示,引出话题:
Theres no doubt that parents have given me a lot since I was born. With their care, I grow up happily. So I think it is necessary to do something special for them to show my gratitude
精彩句型和短语:There is no doubt that....或者 Undoubtedly... 表示毫无疑问
Show ones gratitude:表达感激之情。
句型提升:Undoubtedly,parents have put much time and effort into bringing me up.
点评:务必先翻译提示,然后引出感激父母这个话题。
二.描述一件事:
Both of my parents love music. So it would be a great idea to buy a wonderful CD for them. Last Sunday, I went to a bookstore and chose one among the top 10. While we were having dinner together, I played the CD. It was beautiful. With great joy, they gave me a warm hug and a big smile. I felt very sweet.
点评:记叙一个事的时候,注意要有细节,体现出画面感。亮点:I played the CD.
It was beautiful. With great joy, they gave me a warm hug and a big smile.
另外,要有记叙顺序:事情的起因,经过,结果。 三个缺一不可,为什么要买
CD,买 CD 的经过是什么,CD 怎么样的。送给妈妈后的结果是什么。
三.最后谈感受:
I was really proud that I did something for my parents. Their smiles were the best encouragement for me. I made up my mind to do things like this more often.
点评:谈感受要先说自己对于这个事的感受,这个事的意义是什么。再说以后会怎么做。
精彩句型和短语:Their smiles were the best encouragement for me. Make up ones mind to do sth, 下定决心做某事。
句型提升:Small as it was,The CD represented my love and gratitude to my parents. And I felt really proud that I did something special for them. Encouraged by their understanding smiles, I made up my mind to do things like this more often as my sincere gratitude.
第一档:(15~13 分)
完全符合题目要求,观点正确,要点齐全。句式多样,词汇丰富。语言准确,语意连贯,表达清楚,具有逻辑性。
第二档:(12~9 分)
基本符合题目要求,观点正确,要点齐全。语法结构和词汇基本满足文章需要。语言基本通顺,语意基本连贯,表达基本清楚。虽然有少量语言错误,但不影响
整体理解。
第三档:(8~5 分)
部分内容符合题目要求,要点不齐全。语法结构和词汇错误较多,语言不通顺,表达不够清楚,影响整体理解。
第四档:(4~0 分)
与题目有关内容不多,只是简单拼凑提示词语,所写内容难以理解。