Despite its popularity, not everyone's experience with online dating is positive. Plenty of women are opting out of the "efficiency" of the inline dating world, instead choosing to find a date the old-fashioned way.
虽然网上相亲很火,但并非所有女性的经历都那么美好。许多女性退出了这“高效的”网络相亲世界,而选择了传统的方式择偶。
So what exactly is driving these daters to delete their profiles? We asked the members of our Facebookcommunity why they left online dating to find love IRL. Here's what they had to say:
所以到底是什么让这些女性删除了账号信息呢?我们找到了脸书社区的成员们,询问她们为什么放弃网络相亲,而要找个现实生活的伴侣。她们是这么说的:
1. "Over time, I began to feel like I was losing my true self in the quest to be the girl with the perfect profile."
1、“渐渐地,我开始觉得我在追求虚拟账户上的完美女孩中迷失了自我。”
"I was constantly overthinking what I had typed in my profile or what I was sending in a message to a guy. I would type, delete, type again, delete, etc., like I didn't know who I was in real life."
“我常常会去纠结我在个人资料中写下的信息或是我发给别的男生的消息。我会打一遍,删掉,再打一遍,好像我不知道自己在现实中是什么样子一样。”
2. "There was no spontaneity or fun or butterflies."
2、“没有随性、乐趣和兴奋感。”
"I was sick of constant disappointment or men that wanted to text forever. Or men that were so self-focused. Everything was scheduled and planned forever."
“我受够了对男人们的无尽失望。他们总是想要无休止地发信息,或是太过于自我中心。一切都被永远地安排好了。”
3. "Everything feels forced."
3、“一切都太刻意。”
"It's like you try to put a face to the person you're talking to, but it just feels like this contrived entity. You really have no idea who they are and what they're about or if you have any chemistry."
“就好像你试着去面对和你对话的人,但感觉像是陷入了套路中。你真的不明白他们究竟是谁、想要做什么,也不知道是不是真的对他们有感觉。”
4. "It required a lot more time and energy than I expected."
4、“比想象中的更耗时间和精力。”
"What I did not like was that it felt extremely contrived, as if I was online shopping. I recommend online dating for practice if you haven't dated in a while, but ultimately, I think the chances of meeting someone great are small and require a whole lot of effort."
“我不喜欢网恋的一点就是它太刻意了,就像在网购那样。我建议如果你很久没有约会了,那么可以把它当做一种练习,但我认为最终遇到优质对象的几率很小,还需要很大的努力。”
5. "I got a stalker."
5、“我被跟踪了。”
"My warning to women: If you have a unique name, do not post your first name or even your last initial on your profile ANYWHERE. My stalker situation wasn't as extreme as some, but it irked me enough to get a lawyer which I'm glad I did."
“我对女同胞们的提醒:如果你有一个特别的名字,不要把你的名字甚至是缩写写到资料里的任何地方。我的情况还不算很严重,但还是把我激怒到找律师了。很庆幸我找了。”
6. "I was once asked if I was a man or a woman due to a short hair cut."
6、“我曾因为剪短发而被问是男是女。”
"I gave up on online dating, because I was once asked if I was a man or a woman due to a short hair cut. I replied with, 'If you can't tell the difference between a man and woman, there is no hope for you and you should probably delete your profile.' I then received the response, 'I'm just saying...there are some he-she’s on here and you gotta be careful.'"
“我放弃网恋是因为我曾因为剪短发而被问是男是女。我回答:‘如果你连是男是女都分不出来,你是没有希望的,还是删了账号吧。’他回答:‘我只是说……这里是真的有人妖的,得小心些。’”
7. "Every time I suggested getting together, he seemed to stop messaging me or avoid the question."
7、“每次我建议我们在一起,他好像就不再给我发信息了,或者逃避问题。”
"I had been messaging with a very attractive man who said he was a firefighter, which is my weakness. We spoke for a while, but something did not feel right as I was talking to him. I got the idea to try and figure out how to reverse image through Google, dropped his picture in and bam — the pictures were linked to an Instagram account in England of a semi-famous personal trainer."
“我和一个很帅的自称是消防员的男性聊了一阵,是我的菜,但后来我再和他聊时,感觉就有些不对了。我想到了一个主意,我想到了用谷歌根据照片搜索信息,然后放上去搜索——果然照片链接到了Instagram上的一个英国账号。主人是一个小有名气的私人健身教练。”
8. "Most men my age are looking for women that are much younger."
8、“大多数和我同龄的男性都想找年轻得多的女性。”
"I'm 47 and I have a 5-year-old, so I'm not your average middle-aged woman. Most men my age are looking for women that are much younger, or if they are my age, they want someone who doesn't have young kids."
“我47岁了,有个5岁的孩子,所以我不是普通的中年女性。大多数和我同龄的男性都想找年轻得多的女性,或者如果和我年龄差不多的,他们不想找有小孩子的。”
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