北京市08年高考英语开放式作文点评和习作修改

　　学而思高中部英语教师 刘晓伟

　　第二节 开放作文 （15分）

　　请根据下面提示，写一篇短文。词数不少于50。

　　 In an English speech competition, you are asked to describe the following picture and explain to the judges how you understand it.

　　(请务必将情景作文写在答题卡II第二页指定区域内)

　　写作文有两个基本标准：一要切题，二要有文采。

　　这篇文章的题目要求有两个：（上面红字部分）

　　1. describe the following picture 描述图画内容

　　2. explain to the judges how you understand it 对这幅画的理解

　　所以，这篇文章基本可以分成两段。第一段用来描述图画内容。第二段用来写这幅图画说明了什么问题。第三段总结问题。

　　1．描述图画：

　　圆规（compass，今年很多同学都写不出这个单词，我查了一下这是个超纲词，在《高中英语课程标准（词汇表3500）》和《北京市高考英语考试说明》中都没有出现，显然是出题人的疏忽造成的，起码应该在试卷上提供compass这个单词。）画圆形很轻松，铅笔跑得满头大汗。两者形成了鲜明的对比。

　　2．说明问题：

　　(1) 圆规和铅笔有的特点不同

　　(2) 如何看待对方各自的特点

　　3. 总结问题：升华主题

　　You are somebody if you can innovative, but if you can't you are nobody.

　　第一段没有描述图画是大忌。可以写成：

　　As is shown in the picture, a pair of compasses are proud of drawing a circle with great ease, while a pencil are burdened with drawing a line. We can figure out something meaningful from the picture.

　　In our life, some people work very hard. Ang they often feel very tired. Because they often don't have enough experlence. But they often can be have some sudden harvest. So they usually will success, if they do something.

　　 And another people have enough experlence. So they can do something very fast and well. But they usually can't have some harvest on work. S they can't honour all of life.

　　第二段需要指出问题的所在。首先要引用圆规(compasses) 和pencil 说明他们各自的特点和各自看待对方的态度。然后再升华到人的角度来说明，做人应该怎么怎么样。可以写成：

　　To begin with, difference can be seen clearly between the compasses and the pencil due to their different application. The compasses have every reason to feel superior in drawing a circle because they are designed to do so. But if the compasses are used to draw a line, the pencil may have the same feeling. As a result, a conclusion can be easily drawn: both of them have their own advantages.

　　So don't lose youself in your life.

　　第三段要总结问题，必须是从圆规(compasses) 和pencil的问题中的抽象出来，总结出来一个做人做事的普遍规律。可以写成：

　　From my point of view, we should be aware of our strengths and weaknesses and never show

　　due respect to everyone, for no one is perfect in this world.

　　官方给出的范文：

　　One possible version:

　　 From the picture I can see a pair of proud compasses and a hard-working pencil. The compasses are big, drawing a circle with ease, while the pencil is small, drawing a line with great effort. I think the compasses are reasonable to be proud because no one else can do the job better. At the same time, however, he should realize the pencil has his own advantages. The pencil can do other shapes better than the compasses, even pictures. So in my opinion, while we are confident in ourselves, we should recognize strengths in others and show due respect for them.