高中英语语法-书面表达中组词成句的原则与训练(四)

　　书面表达中组词成句的原则与训练(四)

　　四、简洁凝练

　　简洁凝练的语言能够较为清楚地表达思想，更加有力地突出重点。要避免内容罗嗦、结构松散可以从以下几个方面入手：

　　1、避免使用空洞、多余的词语

　　空洞的词语是给文章添加的累赘。写作中应掌握这样的原则：能用单个单词表达的尽量不用空洞的短语去表达。例：

　　冗长：At this point of time Allen has not yet reached a decision about whether he will offer her a job.

　　简练：At present Allen hasnt decided whether he will offer her a job.

　　2、避免不必要的重复

　　重复使用某些词语有时可以构成平行的句子结构，或达到强调的目的，但是，无目的的重复则会导致冗长、笨拙的句子的产生。写作时，应根据表达需要，决定是否重复表达某些内容。例：

　　冗长：My hometown is a quiet, peaceful（安宁的）place. It is quiet and peaceful because of the small number of people living there.

　　简练：My hometown is a quiet, peaceful place because of the small number of people.

　　3、避免过多地使用并列句

　　过多地使用并列句指的是盲目地把几个并不同等重要的分句用并列连词连接在一起，结果使全句逻辑关系模糊，读来令人感到单调乏味。修改这样的句子，可根据各个分句间的逻辑关系，将一些次要分句改为从句、修饰语或同位语等。例：

　　冗长：We were driving out into the country, and we met our first English teacher riding in a bus, and the bus was crowded.

　　简练：As we were driving out into the country, we met our first English teacher riding in a crowded bus.

　　4、避免过多地使用从属句

　　英语中比较重要的从属概念可用从句的形式来表达，其他次要的概念则多用词或短语来表达，因为句子比短语显得更重要。过多地使用从句会把次要的与主要的概念混为一谈，从而削弱句子重点。纠正过多的从属结构，可以采用把从句改成修饰语、同位语或简单句等形式。例：

　　冗长：He is a man who is honest and who never tells lies.

　　简练：He is an honest man, who never tells lies.

　　5、避免过多使用碎句

　　碎句就是短句。书面表达中过多使用碎句，会破坏信息的连贯性，使表达的内容显得罗嗦、拖沓。通常通过使用同位结构、非谓语动词、介词短语、独立主格结构、复合句等形式可将碎句巧妙地合并在一起。例：

　　碎句：It is a beautiful day, and the sun is shining and a breeze（微风）is blowing.

　　精练：It is a beautiful day with the sun shining and a breeze blowing.

　　碎句：Carl went to the airport. He wanted to see Mrs Black off.

　　精练：Carl went to the airport to see Mrs Black off.

　　练习：在不改变句意的情况下，改写下列句子，使其更加简洁凝练。

　　1. There are over fifty students in this school who are going to take part in the sports meet which is planned for next Sunday.

　　2. Because of the fact that I had a lot of work to do, it wasnt possible for me to accept their invitation.

　　3. The problem of pollution is serious in our city, but if we try our best to stop the pollution, the pollution will stop.

　　4. He told us a story; the story was very interesting.

　　5. Eugene ONeill, was an American writer, and he had an unhappy childhood, and he told the story of his childhood in a play named A Long Dayss Journey Into Night and he said it was written in tears and blood.

　　参考答案：

　　1. Over fifty students in this school are going to take part in the sports meet next Sunday.

　　2. I was too busy to accept their invitation.

　　3. The problem of pollution is serious in our city, but if we try our best ,the pollution will stop.

　　4. He told us a very interesting story.

　　5. Eugene ONeill, an American writer, told the story of his unhappy childhood in a play named A Long Days Journey Into Night, which he said was written in tears and blood.