雅思写作中的中式思维和英式思维
bicycle作者的思路是清晰的,但表达不明确,会造成结构混乱的感觉,因此在雅思写作中应采用Why cycle模式。下面分别列举范文说明中式思维与英式思维的不同之处。
中式思维范文--bicycle(摘自网上雅思考生的习作)
Bicycles have become more and more popular in China. People ride bikes to their work places, to shopping areas, to schools, and so on. During the rush hours, you can often see a boiling sea of bicycles running in all directions. With the largest number of bike riders in the world, China is often referred to as the kingdom of bicycles.(主题句不明显,不知道作者想要说什么:自行车越来越流行,要讨论流行趋势?自行车那么多,要讨论自行车对城市的影响?中国是自行车王国,要讨论中国的自行车历史?)
Compared with cars, bikes have many advantages(这应该是主题句,在这么短的文章里应该放在第一段). First, they are not very expensive, and almost every family can afford them. (这句话分成2个句子比较好,一句是key point,一句做进一步解释)Second, they are very handy and convenient though they are not so fast as cars. With a bike, you can go anywhere you like, and you dont have to look for a large parking place. By riding bikes, you can avoid traffic jams and thus save the time and the money for taking taxis(同第一点一样,但这一点思路有些乱). Third, they do not cause air or sound pollution(?? Riding bikes does good to your health if you ride it regularly(这应该是文章要论述的第四点,但没有连接词,又分了段,打乱了文章的整体结构). In modern times, people are usually too busy to spare any time for physical exercise. Riding a bike to your work place regularly serves as a good way to keep yourself strong and healthy. (? 2个句子的顺序换一下比较好。因为前面已经说了有益于健康,读者等着听解释,但作者却换了话题。第一句话应该是第二句话的原因。)
Therefore, a bicycle is really an important means of transportation in China. It has been very useful, convenient and necessary ever since it was invented. And I do believe it will still be so in the future.(结论态度不鲜明,没有紧扣主题句。 应该重述四个优点,然后给出结论。)
英式思维范文Why cycle?
There are many good reasons to cycle. (第一句话就是主题句,西方人的习惯)Cycling is the most efficient means of getting around London.(好处之一) Many journeys we make are shorter than two miles or less and these are usually faster on a cycle than travelling by car, bus, tube, train or taxi.(进一步解释,加强说服力)。Not only is cycling good for you, it is also fun and available to all(好处之二). It is a chance to get out of the house or workplace, to be active and to be sociable(解释). Getting a bike neednt be expensive and upkeep is low cost and easy. (好处之三,这三个好处只是泛泛说明,一般是前面的论点比后面的更重要,所以句子一个比一个短。)
Save money(开始论述第一点)
Using a bike to replace your regular form of transport is a great way to save money. (主句,符合论点)Its well documented that cycling is the best value way to travel around London(引用统计结果,有绝对说服力) . Compared to cars, bicycles are much cheaper to buy and maintain, and you dont have all the added costs of fuel, Vehicle Excise Duty and parking.(比较法,举例说明怎样省钱)
Save time(论点二)
For a typical London journey, cycling is faster than the car, public transport, taxis or walking(主句,符合论点). Remember that cycling is a door to door service. On a bicycle you can easily cover five miles in half an hour and be confident that youll arrive on time(解释如何省时间). Car or bus journeys take longer and depend on traffic, or irregular bus services(搭汽车时间长,从反面解释骑自行车省时间). For longer trips, you can combine bike and public transport: leaving your bike at the station or sometimes taking it on the train/tube at off-peak times. See the LCC information booklet Transporting Your Bicycle for further information.(进一步解释,帮你解决你有可能遇到的问题,打消你欲辩论的想法。)
Become healthier(论点三)
Cycling is an excellent way to get fit and live longer. (主句,符合论点)By riding a bike youll be incorporating exercise into your daily life. Remember that to stay healthy you need 30 minutes of exercise per day: that 15 minute cycle to work is the perfect prescription for losing weight and getting fit.(解释。口气不是说教,而像是你的保健顾问,说服力强。)
By cycling you cut down your risk of heart attacks, high blood pressure and other illnesses. The benefits, says the British Medical Association, far outweigh any risks associated with cycling.(论据二)
By getting fitter and escaping the frustrations of traffic jams and tube and train delays you will also reduce your stress levels and enjoy your day more. (论据三)
It has been shown that by cycling you will breathe fewer fumes than those in cars or buses, so are less likely to suffer from respiratory diseases.(论据四)
California wildfires and cloned animals 加利福尼亚州野火,克隆动物衰老过程正常
Afghanistan, cancer and athletics boss 英美支持阿富汗政府军,癌症发病原因, 国际田联官员停职
Earth-like planet, Pink cockatoo dies at 83 类地行星,83岁风头鹦鹉逝世
Delhi's pollution and South Africa's solar power 新德里环境污染,南非发展太阳能
Diabetes warning and Queen at 90 糖尿病激增引忧, 英国女王90岁生日
Crash course 速成课
Dangerous heartbeat, Spike Lee and the Oscars 危险的心跳,斯派克·李抵制奥斯卡
Zika threat and back from space 寨卡病毒威胁美国,国际空间站宇航员返回地球
In good nick 品质好、没有损坏
Drought in Ethiopia and MS treatment 埃塞俄比亚干旱,多发性硬化治疗手段新进展
Big Ben and gorilla surprise 维修大本钟,大猩猩生子
Phelps makes history and marine species 菲尔普斯创造历史,海洋新物种
Mars bars and baby gorilla 火星巧克力棒和大猩猩产幼子
Glass-bottomed bridge, cancer risk for HRT and 120-year-old man 世界最长玻璃桥开放,荷尔蒙替代疗法增患癌风险,印度教120岁僧人
Zika virus, Rare whale filmed in Australia 寨卡病毒传播风险,澳大利亚拍到罕见鲸鱼影像
Alligator takes boy and Tate Modern extension 鳄鱼拖走小男孩,泰特现代美术馆扩建完工
Chelsea doctor and surfing in Australia 切尔西队医与球队和解,澳大利亚冲浪
There's method to my madness 我有一个不合常理的办法
UN female, New flag and Apollo 11 倡议提名女秘书长,新西兰换国旗和阿波罗11号再创历史
Zika virus and the A4 waist challenge 寨卡病毒,“A4腰挑战”
Antibiotics and escalator etiquette 美国人过多使用抗生素,伦敦地铁扶梯礼仪
Chinwag 闲谈-英语点津
Hot potato 棘手的问题“烫手山芋”
Angelina Jolie to divorce, Karaoke star at 80 安吉丽娜·朱莉提出离婚申请,八十岁老人出唱片
A bitter pill to swallow 不得不吞的苦药
In one ear and out the other 左耳进,右耳出
Cyborg beetle and the teenage brain 半机械甲虫,青少年脑部发育
Cheap and cheerful 物美价廉
Indian state introduces 'fat tax' 印度一省拟征收“脂肪税”
The cost of protecting the environment, Juno space probe 保护环境付出的代价,“朱诺”木星探测器
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