有这样一个故事:
There is a story:
一位母亲第一次参加家长会,幼儿园的老师说:“你儿子有多动症,在板凳上3分钟都坐不住。”回家的路上,儿子问她老师都说了些什么。她鼻子一酸,差点流下泪来。然而,她还是告诉儿子:“老师表扬了你,说宝宝原来在板凳上坐不了1分钟,现在能坐3分钟了。别的家长都非常羡慕妈妈,因为全班只有宝宝进步了。”那天晚上,儿子破天荒地吃了一大碗米饭,而且没让她喂。
"Your son has ADHD and can't sit on the bench for three minutes," said a kindergarten teacher who attended a parents' meeting for the first time On the way home, her son asked her what her teacher had said. Her nose was so sore that she almost burst into tears. However, she told her son: "the teacher praised you and said that the baby could not sit on the bench for one minute, but now it can sit for three minutes. Other parents are very envious of their mother, because only the baby has improved in the class. " That night, for the first time, my son ate a bowl of rice and didn't let her feed it.
在第二次家长会上,老师说:“全班50名同学,这次数学考试,您的儿子排在第49名。我们怀疑他智力上有些障碍,你最好带他去医院检查一下。”回去的路上,她流下了泪。然而,当回到家里,看到诚惶诚恐的儿子,她又振作起精神说:“老师对你充满信心。她说了,你并不是一个笨孩子,只要能细心些、努力些,会超过你的同桌。”说这话时,她发现,儿子暗淡的眼神一下子舒展开来。第二天上学,儿子比平时哪天都要早。
At the second parents' meeting, the teacher said: "there are 50 students in the class. Your son is 49th in the math exam. We suspect that he has some mental disorders. You'd better take him to the hospital for examination. " On the way back, she shed tears. However, when she came back home and saw her frightened son, she perked up and said, "the teacher is full of confidence in you. She said that you are not a stupid child, as long as you can be careful and work harder, you will surpass your deskmate. " When she said this, she found that her son's dim eyes suddenly extended. The next day, my son went to school earlier than usual.
孩子上了初中,又一次家长会。老师告诉她:“按你儿子现在的成绩,考重点中学有点危险。”她故作惊喜地走出校门,告诉儿子:“班主任对你非常满意,他说了,只要你刻苦努力,用功学习,很有希望考上重点中学。”
The child went to junior high school, another parents' meeting. The teacher told her, "according to your son's current performance, it's a little dangerous to take the key middle school exam." She pretended to be surprised and walked out of the school and told her son: "the head teacher is very satisfied with you. He said that as long as you work hard and study hard, you will have a good chance to enter the key middle school."
高中毕业,儿子把一封印有“清华大学招生办公室”的特快专递交到她的手里,边哭边说:“妈妈,我一直知道我不是一个聪明的孩子,是您……”这时,母亲悲喜交加,再也按捺不住十几年来凝聚在心中的泪水,任它打在手中的那只信封上。
After graduating from high school, her son handed over an express mail with the seal of "Admission Office of Tsinghua University" to her, crying and saying: "Mom, I always know that I am not a smart child, it is you..." At this time, the mother was sad and happy, and could not help but hold back the tears in her heart for more than ten years, letting it hit the envelope in her hand.
显而易见,文中的母亲是一位伟大的母亲,是一位称职的母亲,如果没有她一次次对儿子的表扬,没有一次次对儿子的理解与信任,没有一次次送给儿子信念,那么结果只能是儿子承受无言而苦痛的失败。
Obviously, the mother in this article is a great mother and a competent mother. If she does not praise her son, understand and trust his son, and give him faith, the result can only be his son's failure to bear wordless and bitter pain.
可见,信念是人生的肩膀。这肩膀能够擎起人生的大树,在枝繁叶茂间,我们发现了肩膀创造的奇迹。
It can be seen that faith is the shoulder of life. This shoulder can hold up the tree of life. In the luxuriant foliage, we found the miracle created by shoulder.
[名师点评]
[comments on famous teachers]
这是一篇感悟类的文章,作为一篇满分作文。它有以下几点值得称道:
This is a sentiment article, as a full score composition. It has the following points to be praised:
一、立意不俗。作者能够由一则故事来谈“信念是人生的肩膀”,很不一般。
1、 A good idea. The author can talk about "faith is the shoulder of life" from a story, which is very unusual.
二、结构完整。故事是铺垫,升华是议论部分,这个结构让读者一目了然。
2、 The structure is complete. The story is the foreshadowing, the sublimation is the discussion part, this structure lets the reader be clear at a glance.
三、材料新鲜。作者把一个小故事,演绎成与肩膀有关的话题,使得陈旧的材料变得新鲜。
3、 The material is fresh. The author turns a little story into a topic related to shoulders, which makes the old materials fresh.
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