浙江省金华市孝顺高级中学2016届高考英语作文专题复习：写作指导及学生习作

　　每到高三的时候，在部分学生当中就会出现一些薄弱学科。因此，学校会组织一些“中转优”工作。我们从12月份开始了这样的工作。年级布置给我们的任务是“解难答疑”，我任教高三（1）和高三（12班）， “中转优”两个班共10人。第一次我按照级部的要求我让他们把前一阶段学习中存在的问题提出来，当场给他们分别解答。一节课的时间很快过去了，但当同学们离开之后，我心里总有种说不出的滋味，辅导的事情是做了，但这样做的效率到底如何，不问学生我自己也知道答案。所谓师者，传道、授业解惑也。这样的问题方式完全可以放在课后，学生有问题问一下也就行了，何必拿出单独的时间来辅导呢？经过反思我从第二节课开始改变了教学的方式，我把一节课分成两个部分：1.集中解决学生以往学习中存在问题，让其他学生解答，让学生教学生，特殊的问题由教师作答；2.围绕一个主题启发学生的发散思维，给出关键词，然后让学生写成一篇作文。

　　第二节课上，在集中答疑之后，我开始帮助学生复习十二个月份的英语单词，这些单词对于高三的学生问题并不是太大，但我的用意并不是解决他们的单词问题，而是要让他们有一个明确的时间概念。随后我在黑板上写下了“June”。然后问他们“What’s special about June?” 有个学生在下面低声说 “要高考了”。我随即问到“How do you express ‘高考’ in English?” 这时他们都面面相觑,可以看出他们平时的词汇积累是不够的,我在黑板上写下 “the National Entrance Examination is coming.” 我又问到: “Can we use any other similar word to take place of ‘coming’?” 其中一个答到: approaching.

　　T: What do you think of the National Entrance Examination?

　　S1: Fierce, competitive.

　　S2: It decides/ determines our fate.

　　T: What do you want to do after the exam?

　　S1: Relaxing.

　　S2: Make preparations for college life.

　　T: When you finish your middle school life, it means you are liberated and aren’t middle school students any more. You’ll be grown-ups or adults. Do you know what means?

　　S1: Make contributions to our society.

　　S2:Major in what we are interested in and learn some useful knowledge.

　　T: As a grown-up, you should be responsible for your deeds or behaviours.

　　Maybe you have a lot to think and write about. I’ll give you 20 minutes to write a short passage in class.

　　在课堂教学的过程中，我通过师生之间的一问一答把我想要他们写的作文可能遇到的知识上的难点逐渐地展开，在问答过程中我随时写下一些关键词在黑板上：the National Entrance Examination， approach， liberate，fierce， competitive， adult， responsible， make contributions to， set foot on society， major in， master， concentrate/focus on， be buried in books.

　　2.题目自拟，文体不限。

　　3.当堂课完成。

　　本节课的教学目的是：1.围绕一个主题复习相关的知识，帮助他们建立知识树。解决他们基础知识中的薄弱点，也让他们对以往的知识记忆起来相对容易些。2.让他们在通过课堂上的启发和点拨之后能顺利完成规定话题的写作，培养学生的发散思维能力。3.帮助他们树立时间的紧迫感和对社会的责任感。

　　这节课学生写作任务完成的很顺利，在规定时间里基本完成了布置给他们的任务。在批改的过程中，我觉得他们作文写得出乎我的意料。现摘录下来供大家分析。

　　高三(1) 王琎

　　June

　　June is a special month to me， because I was born in June. I have a special feeling about June. Also, June in 2010 will be a meaningful month for me, because of the approaching of the National Entrance Examination.

　　As is known to all, the National Entrance Examination is very important for us students. After the exam, not only will I be liberated, but also I will be an adult. As with many adults, I will have many responsibilities. I should be responsible for my behaviours. I can’t do the things that I want to .

　　In order to be responsible for my family, I am supposed to have a good job. So it is necessary for me to study some skills. Then I will study in a university and major in what I am interested in. During the time in the university, I will work hard and do many extra materials so that I will be good at the skills. After I master the skills, I will step into society and make contributions to our country and my family members.

　　I believe that the National Entrance Examination will determine my fate, so I will be buried in my study and work hard.

　　我批阅他的作文的时候,给他指出了当中的一些小错误,对他的作文评价是:行文流畅、所学知识使用合理、书写急待提高。

　　June is hot but relaxing. The National Entrance Examination is approaching and we are facing the fate.

　　In order to be admitted to a good university, we need to do a lot of things. We need to go over our knowledge; we need to go gain the feeling of the exam , and most of all, we should try to control our minds so that we calm ourselves down to do the examination.

　　After the examination, we will be free. Anything that wouldn’t be allowed before will be fine, playing day after day, even we can make our own girlfriends. As far as I’m concerned, though I don’t believe in love, I also want to make a friend and treat her as a girlfriend. Love is hard, but is dependent on you.

　　University is a place for further study. Learning useful skills , developing the wisdom, strengthening the body, only by relying on yourself, will you expend your area in heart.

　　Take on your duty, love your classmates and teachers, and show your kindness like the sunshine in June.

　　June must be a month with endless experiences. May it be a turning point in your fate, during which you will grow up.

　　Set foot on your future, I long to see what will happen, and what I will get.

　　给他的评语是：整篇文章行文比较优美，但连贯性欠缺，书写较以前有很大进步，要力求避免一些低级错误。

　　Everyone has a lot of imaginations about June. June is a season full of different mood. Students may feel nervous in June because they will take the National Entrance Examination. The examination will certainly decide their fates. If a student achieve a success, he may feel excited and relaxed. NMET is a fierce competition. Every student should try his best to prepare for the examination. After the NMET, it means that we are frown-ups, and then we will have to make contributions to the society and our parents. Before this, we should master some skills so that we can survive in the world. So, we should make the hot June more wonderful so that we can make our life more wonderful.

　　June is coming. Let’s make preparations for it. We are supposed to check all the knowledge that we studied. If we devote our hearts and time to our study, we can gain all the happiness in the end.

　　给他的评语是:文章基本流畅,运用了所学的熟悉的知识来表达自己的思想,段落层次还不够分明,有一些小错误要尽力避免。

　　Teachers say that June is equal to our fates. For the National Entrance Examination is approaching, we should work harder. Do you find that your classmates are buried in their books after class, and also they do many extra materials. So the month is full of competition. What’s more, after June we will be thoroughly liberated, we can do whatever we like. Then you will set foot on the university, majoring in what you are interested in. On the other hand, you should master modern technology so that you can find a better job to support your family. As we are grown-ups, it can’t be denied that we should be responsible for our deeds.

　　Over the past few years, we have studied a lot. Just work harder and you will succeed. Best wishes for you to live your dream in June.

　　给她的评语是：书写美观整洁、文章基本上能够达意、在思想性和连贯性方面还需要努力。

　　June is a month which is filled with joy, but the next June will decide our fate, because we will have the National Entrance Examination.

　　The big day is approaching, we feel much more stressed. To achieve a high grade and live our dreams, we must make the most of time to review our knowledge and do some extra materials. Though we are buried in books, don’t forget to set a proper goal, it will help you to improve your confidence.

　　After the examination, whatever you get, June will be a large liberation. The moment you graduate from the Senior High, you will step into society, which is full of fierce competitions. In order to live by ourselves, we must major in what we are interested in, when we are at college. What’s most important at college is that we should master skills and improve our abilities.

　　If we try our best to achieve this goal, we will be able to make more contributions to our country and society.

　　给她的评语是：书写工整，文章本来可以更流畅些，因为拼写错误和一些小的错误影响了读者的阅读。