Lesson Thirty-Two
Section One:
Tapescript.
News Item 1:
Presenter: Now before the weather report, we have some road news for you from Philip Thomson.
Philip Thomson: Yes, well, the A41 is still very busy at the Dome roundabout this morning. Harrow Road, the A404, Harrow Road is now flowing freely, no problems there. The other congestion we have is in the A1M up near Hatfield. The M1 is heavy but at least is moving along, a little bit slower than normal. In Hammersmith, road repairs between Ridge Street and King Street are causing delay. Finally, a demonstration march at twelve thirty will cause congestion in central London.
News Item 2:
Presenter: And now our weather report. Nice sunshine all day long today, soon becoming very warm, but there will be some relief from the heat with something of a breeze developing. Even so, the temperature will get up to twenty-five degrees later today; it’s already up to nineteen degrees Celsius now, at nine in the morning, and it’ll go on rising. Very little cloud at any stage during the day, just a few clouds drifting around early in the afternoon, so we should end up the day with a good fourteen hours of sunshine going into the record books. That breeze is an easterly one that’s going to keep the coastal areas a little bit colder during the day but still quite pleasant. Over the night, clear, dry weather, still a little bit of the breeze and the temperature down to sixteen in central London and twelve or thirteen out of town.
Section Two:
Tapescript.
Accommodation:
Visitor: Where can I stay in this town?
Resident: There are lots of hotels, but they tend to be fairly expensive. And then there are bed and breakfast places, which are much cheaper—and you can find out about them through looking in the paper, or else just walking around the streets, and they have signs in the window saying ‘Bed&Breakfast’. And then there are youth hostels.
Visitor: What are the youth hostels like?
Resident: The youth hostels are OK. All you get is a bed, but they do tend to be very cheap.
Visitor: Do I have to become a member?
Resident: Yes, you do, in fact. But it’s very easy to join, and there’s an office along the road, where you can go and sign on.
Schedule in the Nursing Home:
Mrs. Weston is describing her schedule in the nursing home.
I usually get up at 6.30. I’ve always been an early riser. When my husband was alive, we had to be up by five o’clock. He was a long distance train driver, you see. Before breakfast I have a cup of tea and I listen to music on the radio. Then between seven and eight I get dressed and eat breakfast—a boiled egg and a large glass of orange juice—I never have anything else. Then at eight o’clock I always watch breakfast television—for the news and the weather and the chat. And then I usually have a nap until lunch. That’s always at twelve. We have a big lunch here at Twybury’s—soup, roast meat, potatoes, vegetables, always a pudding. After lunch I like being taken out in my wheelchair, or even in a car, if there’s anyone to take me. I hate staying indoors. I like looking in the shop windows, or sitting in a park and watching the world go by. Sometimes someone will read to me or write some letters. I usually fall asleep about three, and then of course we have our tea around five—nothing heavy—cold meats and salads and fruit, and that kind of thing. In the evening we play cards, or do knitting, and then I’m in bed by eight. I am getting on a bit, you know. I’m nearly eighty-three.
C. Free Samples:
Man: Good morning, love.
Woman: Morning.
Man: Sleep well? I’ve made some tea; there you are.
Woman: Thanks. Any post?
Man: Not really. There’s a postcard from Aunt Lil and there’s a questionnaire to fill in from the company which gave us the free samples of tinned meat to try out for them.
Woman: They’ve got a nerve!
Man: But we did say we’d return the questionnaire when we took the samples.
Woman: What do they want to know?
Man: If we like it.
Woman: If we liked it? Are they joking? You’re not filling it in now, are you? What for?
Man: We did promise and if I do it now I can post it on my way to work.
Woman: Well, write ‘we didn’t like it.’
Man: I’ll put ‘not much.’ That sounds nicer. Then it says ‘If not, why?’
Woman: No flavour. Too much fat.
Man: ‘How did you cook it?’ is next.
Woman: Fried it like they said, didn’t I? Took a mouthful and gave it to the cat.
Man: ‘Guests’ comments, if any’!
Woman: The cat became ill. Poor thing, her fur went all green.
Man: ‘Did guests ask for the brand name?’
Woman: Tell them that our cat can’t speak.
Man: ‘Will you be buying our product regularly?’
Woman: Certainly not! They must be out of their minds.
Man: ‘Did you find the tin attractive?’
Woman: Cut myself opening it. Nearly lost my thumb. Couldn’t use it for a week. I thought it was infected.
Man: ‘Any other comments?’
Woman: Well, tell them we’re too polite to answer that.
Murders in the House:
Mrs. Woodside: Well, Mrs. Long, how do you like it here?
Mrs. Long: Oh, since we had the house redecorated, it’s much nicer to live in. But there are still a few things that bother us.
Mrs. Woodside: Oh, what sort of things?
Mrs. Long: Nothing to do with the house, really. It’s just that our daughter, Jane, hasn’t been ... uh ... well, she hasn’t been sleeping well lately. I mean, she’s had a few nightmares.
Mrs. Woodside: Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.
Mrs. Long: Uh, excuse me, Mrs. Woodside, but ... do you mind if I ask you something?
Mrs. Woodside: No, of course not. Go ahead.
Mrs. Long: What ... what do you know about ... the people who lived here before?
Mrs. Woodside: Not very much. Nobody has stayed here very long since ... well, since ... you know...
Mrs. Long: Since?... Since when?
Mrs. Woodside: Well, since those ... surely you must know about it?
Mrs. Long: No, I don’t know. What are you talking about?
Mrs. Woodside: Those terrible murders that happened here more than twenty years ago?
Mrs. Long: Murders? What murders?
Mrs. Woodside: But I thought you knew! This house once belonged to a ... I really thought you knew ... to a man who’s supposed to have murdered three or four women! Right here! In this house! Afterwards, he’s supposed to have cut up their bodies ... right here ... in the kitchen.
Mrs. Long: What? Are you serious?
Mrs. Woodside: Oh, dear. I hope I haven’t said anything to ... well, to upset you.
Mrs. Long: I can’t believe it.
Mrs. Woodside: Neither could I. Not at first, at least. He seemed such a nice man.
Mrs. Long: Who?
Mrs. Woodside: Taplow. Gordon Taplow. He didn't seem like the kind of man who could do such things, at all.
Mrs. Long: You mean you knew him?
Mrs. Woodside: Yes, of course I did. Not very well, but I used to see him in the street occasionally ... We said hello to each other. He was a very quiet man. You wouldn’t have thought he could have hurt a mouse. Once, I remember, he invited me in for a cup of tea.
Mrs. Long: And what happened?
Mrs. Woodside: Nothing. I ... I never got round to it ... to coming in for a cup of tea. I was always too busy. I suppose it was a good thing, wasn’t it?
Mrs. Long: What?
Mrs. Woodside: That I never came in for a cup of tea.
Section Three:
Tapescript.
Banking:
Bank Manager: Now, Miss Andrews, how much do you actually want to deposit with us in your new account?
Helen Andrews: Well, it’s just around two thousand pounds that I won on the premium bonds.
Bank Manager: Right. I now need your full name and address.
Helen Andrews: Helen Andrews. 33 Bedford Road...
Bank Manager: Helen Andrews. Would you please spell that?
Helen Andrews: A-N-D-R-E-W-S.
Bank Manager: Address?
Helen Andrews: 33 Bedford, that’s B-E-D-F-O-R-D....
Bank Manager: So 33 Bedford....
Helen Andrews: Road, London E14.
Bank Manager: Right, er ... now do you want a deposit or a current account?
Helen Andrews: Well, I want to be able to take my money out at any time.
Bank Manager: I see. So you probably want a current account.
Helen Andrews: Well, if you say so. I’ve only had a post office savings account until now.
Bank Manager: Well, with a current account you can ... have a cheque book, or you can come into the bank and take the money out as you like. Of course, there’s no interest on a current account.
Helen Andrews: Not at all?
Bank Manager: No. If you put it into a seven day’s deposit account, of course, you get interest, but in a current account, none.
Helen Andrews: Well, most people have current accounts, don't they?
Bank Manager: Well, they do if they’ve not got an awful lot of money and they need to use it regularly. Eh ... so that’s probably the best thing for you.
Helen Andrews: Well, you'll give me a cheque book, won't you?
Bank Manager: I’ll give you a cheque book immediately, yes, er...
Helen Andrews: Do you need my signature?
Bank Manager: Ah yes, we’ll need er ... two or three specimen signatures...
Helen Andrews: OK. And I will get a cheque card ... I mean one of those cards which I’m allowed to use for up to fifty pounds a day.
Bank Manager: Eh, eh, now we don’t actually give a cheque card until you’ve had an account with us for six months.
Helen Andrews: Six months?
Bank Manager: Yes, we have to see how the account’s going, you see.
Helen Andrews: But that’s crazy. I mean I used to work in a shop and we’d never accept cheques without a cheque card. I mean no one will accept my money.
Bank Manager: Well, er ... this is how we work, I’m afraid.
Helen Andrews: Well, I’ll have to reconsider everything again, I think. I had no idea you were as strict as this...
How to Advertise for a Bank:
If you ask someone, they’ll say that the bank is where you can cash a cheque. But it’s more than that and we have to tell people that in our advertisements. There are several things to think about. When do you start? I mean at what age. That is the first problem. I think you must start very young. So we said: ‘Let’s introduce the name of the bank to children and they will never forget it.’ The next question is this: How do you attract the different ago groups? My partner said ‘Why don’t we use a gimmick for each age group? Give them something for nothing—money boxes for young children, T-shirts for teenagers, gold pens for young executives.’ That always works. But what do you give to your best customer? That’s another question. What about leather diaries, for example?
Banks are very competitive. How do you think of something new? That’s always a problem. We were one of the first banks to have drive—in banks and to open on Saturdays, but now many banks do. Of course, most banks now offer insurance and travel services, and all the usually standing order and direct debit services. The other thing about advertising is where. Where do you put the ads—on television, of course, but which journals and newspapers? And when and how often? These are questions you have to ask yourself.
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