在学生平时的SAT写作练习中,留学的老师们通过长期的观察与总结,发现了6类常见的问题,这是导致学生在考试中丢分的原因。英语和汉语表达有区别,如果在英语写作中套汉语思维,就是中式化英语的表现,这只能使文章语言蹩脚、冗赘。今天我们就来看SAT写作6类常见问题之三:表达受中文影响。
1、Original: If we agree to say that school offers us the best book knowledge acquisition then our society offers us the best surviving techniques in a hard way
Revised: If we agree that school offers the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge, then our society offers us the best method for acquiring common sense or street smarts.
Agree to say that表达中式化,只需要agree that即可;the best book knowledge acquisition改为the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge更为恰当,同样,后面的the best surviving techniques改为the best method for acquiring common sense...;加上street marks给文章的词汇增添色彩。
2、Original: They can spend more time studying education and communication to improve their role as a mother, wifes and daughter.
Revised: They can also decide to spend more time studying, education themselves, in order to improve themselves in their roles as mothers, wives and daughters
原句中studying education and communication的说法中式化,不符合英语的表述,应该为studying,educating themselves。除了词语表达,此句中还存在其他问题,如名词单复数的使用:不是提高他们的角色,而是提高他们自身以扮演好母亲角色。还有,女性不止一个人。很多人都在扮演母亲角色,role和mother应用复数,故将improve their role as a mother改为improve themselves in their roles as mother;同样,为保持一致,wife和daughter也可用复数,原文中wife的复数写法有误,应该是wives。
3、Original:If you can get the point of communication by watching TV,will you...?
Revised:If one can learn about communicating from television,will you...?
原句的get the point of communication by watching TV表达不清,让人难以理解,应该是指从电视上学习交际:learn about communicating from television。
所以考生在平时阅读英语材料和练习SAT写作时,要注意英语表达和汉语表达的差别,切忌在写作中硬套汉语思维,多参考一些优秀范文以及作文赏析,尽量避免上面所提到的SAT写作问题。
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