下面是专家对于一篇SAT作文的修改,这篇SAT作文的作者基础一般,专家把文章拆成了五部分,分别做了点评,包括分析部分和修改部分。
Some failed experiences are useful for us.
第一部分:
Take myself for as an example. I played tennis at the age of eight. When I was eleven years old, I took part in a Sports Meeting about tennis which was organized by Jiangsu Province, a province in the southeast of China. 1At the beginning of the group match I had won two opponents, but my third opponent, Hu, who was in the Jiangsu 2provinciances team, defeated me. The score was 1:6 and 2:6. At the end of our match, he held out his thumb to the ground and said, Loser! You cannot win forever!
I could not forget it after the match, though I would have another doubles match the next day.
分析:
1.in the first group stage
2.provincial team 省队
第二部分:
1 His words reverberated unceasingly nearby my ear, even in mine dream.The next day, I could not focus on the match. At the beginning of the match, the score was 1:4.
2 What are you doing? My partner shouted at me while his hand knocked at my head and his arm winded around my shoulder. You shouldnt pay attention to your failure that was something in the past. And you must focus on this match now! He shouted. At last, we won the match and got the prize of 6th that year.
分析:
1 SAT作文的修改:His words stayed in my mind for such a long time that I could not focus my attention on the doubles match the next day.
2 呵呵,在这位同学的营造下,他的朋友成了又一个马景涛,很喜欢吼,看过实在忍俊不禁。
SAT作文的修改:He, holding out his hand, firstly knocked at my head, had me in his arm and told me some words that I would never forget, Cheer up. Do not cry over the split milk. Just let it go. Put aside the previous failure and try your best in the current match. He drove those words so deep into my heart that I finally made it. Finally, we won the 注:各位要学会多用对话加强真实感。
雅思写作思路详解(附实例范文)
雅思写作的十大题目类型
雅思写作话题提纲:老年人问题
雅思写作思路指导:动物实验的争论
雅思写作范文:动物是人类的朋友
雅思写作思路指导:八选三
雅思写作高分开头段分享
雅思写作话题提纲:公共场合的监视器
雅思图表写作经典范文
雅思写作需要遵循的三个步骤
雅思写作语法知识:句子分类
雅思写作话题提纲:明星是否该拿高薪
雅思写作图表范文:美国婚姻状况
雅思写作素材:Obamanomics
雅思写作真题范文:frequency repetition
雅思写作中的经典笑话
雅思写作思路指导:义工课
刘瑜:雅思写作真题解析
雅思写作议论文精彩句型10句
雅思写作范文:大学教育的目的
雅思写作话题解析:音乐对人的影响构思
雅思写作经典范文:论述你心目中的老师
雅思写作话题思路:监狱的功能
雅思写作8分范文:人生的烦恼
雅思写作话题思路指导:电视资讯中的暴力
雅思图表写作范文:城市地铁系统的特点
雅思图表写作范文:世界用水量及消费量
雅思写作材料:年轻男士应具有的新形象
雅思写作思路指导:通才教育 vs 专才教育
雅思写作真题超详细分析
| 不限 |
| 英语教案 |
| 英语课件 |
| 英语试题 |
| 不限 |
| 不限 |
| 上册 |
| 下册 |
| 不限 |