The mind is a powerful thing, and in a nanosecond, it can elevate or crush our mood. There’s a real problem when we start buying into the negative thoughts we have about ourselves.
我们的内心非常强大,在一瞬间就会提升或毁掉我们的心情。而真正的问题在于,如何将内心深处那些消极想法通通赶出去。
Many of us have problems with negative thoughts playing on the channel of our minds, but if you’re engaging in it consistently, and you believe it, it could be eroding your sense of self-esteem. Here are a few beliefs that indicate you may need to switch the station:
很多人脑海中都会不断浮现消极的想法,更糟糕的是,如果你真的时不时地去想,你就会信以为真,这足以摧毁你的自尊。如果你也会出现下面这些消极观念,那就代表你应该做点改变了。
I’m a loser. 我是个失败者。
I’m not good enough. 我不够好。
I don’t deserve…. 我不配......
No one likes me. 没人喜欢我。
I suck at relationships. 我不会处理感情。
I’m a failure. 我太失败了。
Negative thoughts conjures up bad feelings and hooks you into believing that what those old tapes in your head are playing is actually true. In short, it brings your focus to your failures, and that gets you nowhere.
消极的想法会带来不好的感受,在那脑海中不断的像老式磁带一般重复,也会让你信以为真。简而言之,这会让你把注意力全部放在失败的事情上,会让你彻底迷失自己。
What can you do? Here are some suggestions:
你能做些什么呢?下面是一些建议:
1. Live in the moment
活在当下
Self-talk is so subtle that we often don’t notice its effect on our mood and belief systems. Key things to notice are “if only or “what if” statements: the former keep you stuck in the past with regret, while the latter keep you fearful of the future. There is nothing you can do about the past, and the future isn’t here yet, so stay in the present moment.
内心的声音太微妙,有时我们根本不会注意到他们对情绪和信念产生的影响。最需要注意的就是“要是......多好” 和“假使......将会怎样” 这样的想法:前者会让你陷入对过去无尽的悔恨,后者会让你对未来充满恐惧。对于过去,你无能为力,而未来还未到来,好好活在当下吧。
2. Visualize the good things
让那些美好变得形象生动
If we want to change the negative tapes playing in our heads, we have to visualize ourselves positively—that means seeing yourself non-judgmentally. Picture accepting yourself. How would that look? Draw a picture in your mind and expand on it.
如果要换掉脑海中不断播放的消极磁带,我们就要看到自己身上积极的一面,也就是说不带评判的看看自己。在内心细细描述客观接受自己会是什么的画面。细细画出心中所想,那会是什么样?
3. Recognize that actions always follow beliefs
要认识到行为由信念指引
Whatever you believe, you’ll experience more of, and you’ll also find yourself behaving in ways that are congruent with your beliefs. So, start believing the best about yourself: act as if you believe that you’re a valuable and worthy person.
不管你是否相信,你以后的人生会经历更多,也会发现自己的行为和信念是相辅相成的。所以要开始相信自己最好的一面:相信自己是一个有价值的人,然后开始行动吧。
4. Pay attention to triggers
留神那些“导火索”
Triggers are anything that can start the old tapes playing. If a certain person is a trigger for you, set boundaries with them.
导火索可以使任何让脑海中消极磁带播放的人。如果某个人是你的导火索,那么就远离他们。
5. Develop positive counterstatements to refute negative self-talk
积极反驳内心那些消极的声音
Instead of always putting yourself down in your head, think of some things you actually like about yourself. What are your strengths, what are you good at? Keep your counterstatements in the here-and-now, instead of saying “I’m not good enough” try saying, “I am capable. I’m good at ______. I accept myself the way I am.”
与其在脑海中一味的打压自己,还不如想想你到底喜欢自己什么样子。你的强项是什么,特长是什么?与其说“我不够好”,不如现在就开始说这句正能量的话语:“我有能力,我擅长....,我喜欢现在的自己。”
Thinking poorly about ourselves gets us nowhere and is extremely self-limiting. Decide today to turn off the negative self-talk channel in your mind and develop your true potential.
妄自菲薄只会让自己迷失方向,同时限制自身发展。从今天开始就关掉内心的消极频道,挖掘自身的潜力吧。
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