The topic of trust is an important factor in all matters of the heart — and here’s why. Men lie to women. Women lie to men. And most people agree that some lying is even necessary — to avoid petty squabbles and to grease the wheels of a relationship。
感情最重信任——但事实是,男女之间往往充满谎言。不过,很多人也认为,谎言是避免无谓的争论、缓和人际关系的必要手段。以下就是男人最常说的七个慌
1. “Me? I graduated top of my class。”
“我读书的时候,成绩顶呱呱!”
This is a classic case of the runaway male ego, designed to present a man in the best light and impress a woman. When the lies continue into marriage, it’s not long before the truth will out。
这句经典谎言恰恰诠释了潜在的大男子主义,为男人在女人心中留下了完美形象。不过,一旦结婚,真相不久便会水落石出。
2. “Of course I like your friends!”
“我当然喜欢你的朋友!”
A man I know told his girlfriend, “You’re a great cook — much better than my mother。” In fact, his mother is a chef at a well-known New York restaurant. Fortunately for him, by the time his girlfriend discovered the truth — when they dined at his mother’s restaurant — she was so in love that she forgave his overzealous compliment。
我的某个朋友跟他的女友说:“你的厨艺真了不得,连我妈都赶不上你。”其实,他老妈是纽约某家著名餐厅的大厨。幸运的是,当他们在那家餐厅吃饭一切真相大白的时候,女孩已经深深爱上了他,原谅了他的溢美之词。
3. “Honey, you’re the best。”
“亲爱的,你是最棒的。”
In the first rush of romance it makes sense for a man to engage in exaggerated praise of a woman’s beauty and sexuality. But “you’re the best” lies can paralyze a relationship。
在恋爱初期,男人有必要刻意夸赞女人的美貌和性感。但是,“你最棒”这样的言辞有时候也会引起麻烦。
4. “No, I can’t call you. I don’t even know where I’ll be。”
“我都不知道会在哪儿,没法给你打电话。”
These are the sad lies, the ones he tells because he’s falling out of love. The more quickly a woman seeks the truth behind these lies, the sooner she can remedy the relationship — or, if necessary, end it。
男人如果跟你讲这种丧气的谎言,那就意味着他不再爱你了。女人趁早识破这种谎言,才有望弥补彼此的关系——要么,就干脆了断吧。
5. “That dress isn’t too tight. It looks great!”
“那件裙子刚刚好,你穿上去太美了!”
By and large, these are the good lies — the ones that show he cares. But kind lies can be too much of a good thing if a man habitually says only what his partner wants to hear. It sets the woman up for rude awakenings。
说起来,这应该是善意的谎言——表示他在乎你的感受。但是,如果男人总是习惯性地讲你爱听的话,未必就是好事。以后,女人听到丁点儿逆耳之言都有可能受不了。
6. “They’re downsizing at work. But don’t worry. They won’t get me。”
“公司在裁员,但是别担心,他们不可能炒我鱿鱼的。”
Many men still feel paternalistic about the women they love, so they lie to spare them worry. But these lies can destroy the very sense of confidence that the man hoped to create. And they can make a woman feel she is not a respected partner in the relationship。
很多男人在心爱的女人面前总有一种“家长义气”,所以也总会撒点小谎来抚慰女人的忧虑。不过,这种谎言有时反倒会挫伤信心,让女人觉得自己并未得到真正的尊重。
7. “Sure, I’ll mow the lawn — as soon as this crick in my back goes away。”
“好吧,等我背痛好些,我就去修理草坪。”
There are few things that trouble a man more than a woman’s anger — or nagging, as he calls it — so he lies to avoid a scene. It is in “hassle-prevention lying” that men can demonstrate their greatest versatility。
再没有比女人的怒气或是喋喋不休的唠叨更让男人恼火的事儿了,于是他不得不撒谎来逃避这些事情。用男人自己的话来说,这些都是“化解争论的小谎言”。
“I’ll take the kids to the park — when the weather gets nicer,” he says as he goes out the door with golf clubs. “I would have scrubbed the pots, but I couldn’t find the scouring pads” — never looking under the sink。
“天气再好点的话,我就带小孩去公园玩。”他会边说边准备去打高尔夫。“我是想洗碗来着,但没找到抹布。”——好吧,他可不会去看水槽下面是什么。
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