生活大爆炸第1季中英字幕14
00:00:00,900 --> 00:00:04,420
这三明治真是个彻底的失败品
This sandwich is an unmitigated disaster.
2
00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:06,510
我点的是火鸡和烤牛肉
I asked for turkey and roast beef
3
00:00:06,730 --> 00:00:08,450
全麦上放生菜和芝士
With lettuce and swiss on whole wheat.
4
00:00:08,660 --> 00:00:09,250
那他们给你的什么?
What did they give you?
5
00:00:09,460 --> 00:00:10,480
火鸡和烤牛肉
Turkey and roast beef
6
00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:13,280
全麦上放的芝士和生菜
With swiss and lettuce on whole wheat.
7
00:00:17,830 --> 00:00:21,280
东西确实一样
但是顺序不对啊
It's the right ingredients, but in the wrong order.
8
00:00:21,500 --> 00:00:23,610
一个合格的三明治
In a proper sandwich,
9
00:00:23,830 --> 00:00:25,510
它的芝士要紧贴着面包
The cheese is adjacent to the bread
10
00:00:25,730 --> 00:00:28,580
这样会提供给生菜一个有水分的屏障
To create a moisture barrier against the lettuce.
11
00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:32,380
他们可能带着这玩意过了一趟洗车房
They might as well have dragged this thing through a car wash.
12
00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,350
不太可能吧
I don't believe it.
13
00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:36,250
我知道
这是很基本的烹饪知识
I know. it's basic culinary science.
14
00:00:36,460 --> 00:00:39,380
有人拍卖了一个原版电影里用过的时间机器道具
Some guy is auctioning off a miniature time machine prop
15
00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,980
但竟然没人竞拍
From the original film, and no one is bidding on it.
16
00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:44,910
电影"时间机器"里的时间机器?
A time machine from the movie the time machine?
17
00:00:45,130 --> 00:00:48,780
不
是"苏菲的选择"里的时间机器
No. a time machine from sophie's choice.
18
00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:51,310
厉害
苏菲在电影里是用过一个时间机器
Boy, sophie could have used a time machine in that movie.
19
00:00:51,530 --> 00:00:53,610
你见过吗?
挺刚猛啊
Did you see it? it's rough.
20
00:00:53,830 --> 00:00:55,710
酷毙了
Oh, that's cool.
21
00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:57,750
只要800美金?
It's only $800?
22
00:00:57,960 --> 00:00:59,210
没错
那是我出的价钱
Yeah. and that's my bid.
23
00:00:59,430 --> 00:01:00,550
你出价800美元?
You bid $800?
24
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:02,210
我没多想一时定下的嘛
It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
25
00:01:02,430 --> 00:01:03,710
我想它怎么都会飙到上千的
I figured it would go for thousands,
26
00:01:03,930 --> 00:01:05,610
我只是想参与一下而已
And I just wanted to be a part of it.
27
00:01:05,830 --> 00:01:07,750
拍卖还剩30秒就结束了
There's only 30 seconds left in the auction.
28
00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:08,910
你有800美金吗?
Do you have $800?
29
00:01:09,130 --> 00:01:11,280
撼动不了这台小型时间机器
Not to blow on a miniature time machine.
30
00:01:11,500 --> 00:01:12,550
别担心
一般大家都是
Well, don't worry. the way these things work
31
00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:14,010
等到最后一秒钟
Is people wait until the last second to bid,
32
00:01:14,230 --> 00:01:15,850
然后突然杀进来把它拍走
这就叫淘宝
And then they swoop in and get it. it's called sniping.
33
00:01:16,060 --> 00:01:17,080
15秒
15 seconds.
34
00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:19,650
快点啊
淘宝人
Come on, snipers.
35
00:01:19,860 --> 00:01:22,350
10
9
8...
Ten, nine, eight...
36
00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:23,980
你的淘宝人呢?
Where are your snipers?
37
00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:25,910
5
淘啊
Five... snipe.
38
00:01:26,130 --> 00:01:26,910
4
淘啊
Four... snipe.
39
00:01:27,130 --> 00:01:27,980
3
淘啊
Three... snipe!
40
00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:29,050
2
淘啊
Two... snipe!
41
00:01:29,260 --> 00:01:30,510
1
One...
42
00:01:30,730 --> 00:01:32,480
祝贺你
Congratulations!
43
00:01:32,700 --> 00:01:35,150
你光荣地成为这台小型时间机器的主人了
You are the proud owner of a miniature time machine!
44
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,180
你个幸运的家伙
You lucky duck.
45
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:40,350
我想不通怎么没人竞拍了
I wonder why no one else bid.
46
00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,780
这是部经典高科技电影里很有纪念意义的东西啊
This is a classic piece of sci-fi movie memorabilia.
47
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,680
我知道
可我仍然没钱买它
Yeah, I know! I still can't afford it.
48
00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:45,980
要不我们一起凑钱吧?
Why don't we share it?
49
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:47,410
我们每人出200
We'll each put in 200 bucks, and we'll
50
00:01:47,630 --> 00:01:49,180
然后我们轮流把它放家里
Take turns having it in our house.
51
00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:51,280
一个时间共享的时间机器
A time-share time machine.
52
00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:53,680
我同意
谢尔顿?
I'm in. sheldon?
53
00:01:53,900 --> 00:01:55,780
还用你问吗?
Need you ask?
54
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,250
可我还是不明白怎么就没人出价
I still don't understand why no one else bid.
55
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:10,350
我明白为什么没人出价了
I understand why no one else bid.
56
00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:39,950
那单子上确实有写是小型的吗?
Did the listing actually say "miniature"?
57
00:02:41,630 --> 00:02:43,910
我也在想
I just assumed.
58
00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:48,950
谁会800块就卖一个完整尺寸的时间机器啊?
Who sells a full-size time machine for $800?
59
00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:53,510
某人肯定处于两块韦恩集合图的交集
In a venn diagram, that would be an individual located
60
00:02:53,730 --> 00:02:54,880
一张集合图写着"不再需要时间机器"
Within the intersection of the sets "no longer want my time machine"
61
00:02:55,100 --> 00:02:58,050
另一张写着"急需800块"
And "need $800."
62
00:02:58,260 --> 00:03:00,480
这个价钱的确非常低了
It's actually a tremendous bargain.
63
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:01,550
就算加上运费
Even with shipping, it works out
64
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:04,480
算下来平均每磅不到4美金呢
To less than four dollars a pound.
65
00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:08,110
调味酱稣虾是12块5
Cocktail shrimp are $12.50.
66
00:03:08,330 --> 00:03:10,780
我们怎么把这玩意弄上楼?
How are we going to get it upstairs?
67
00:03:12,500 --> 00:03:13,710
如果把这个盘子取下来
If we take the dish off,
68
00:03:13,930 --> 00:03:15,210
应该能放进电梯里
It might fit in the elevator.
69
00:03:15,430 --> 00:03:18,280
对
可是电梯都坏了2年了
Yes, but the elevator has been broken for two years.
70
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:19,610
我曾经想问过你
I've been meaning to ask you.
71
00:03:19,830 --> 00:03:21,780
你说我们是不是该打个电话呢
Do you think we should make a call about that?
72
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,750
没必要
Not necessary.
73
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,480
我是工程学硕士
I have a master's in engineering.
74
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:29,210
我闭眼都能远程修复卫星
I remotely repair satellites on a regular basis.
75
00:03:29,430 --> 00:03:32,750
我还能检修航天飞机载弹头
I troubleshoot space shuttle payloads.
76
00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:36,210
当火星探测器开始向左行驶时
When the mars rover started pulling to the left, I performed
77
00:03:36,430 --> 00:03:40,650
我在6200万英里以外进行用户接口联合
A front-end alignment from 62 million miles away.
78
00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:52,380
不
这宝贝已经坏了
No. that baby's broken.
79
00:03:53,420 --> 00:03:55,970
加油啊
伙计们
用力推!
Come on, guys! push!
80
00:03:56,180 --> 00:03:57,370
如果我再用力
If I push any harder,
81
00:03:57,580 --> 00:04:00,500
就快把结肠给"分娩"出来了
I'm going to give birth to my colon.
82
00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:02,430
我手指都快没知觉了
快点!
I can't feel my fingers. hurry up!
83
00:04:02,650 --> 00:04:03,500
不管多快
It's the same amount of work
84
00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:04,830
工作量都是一样的
No matter how fast you go.
85
00:04:05,050 --> 00:04:06,000
基本的物理原理
Basic physics.
86
00:04:06,220 --> 00:04:06,830
-谢尔顿?
-干嘛?
Sheldon? yeah?
87
00:04:07,050 --> 00:04:08,830
如果我的手指以后还能用
If my fingers ever work again,
88
00:04:09,050 --> 00:04:11,330
我想我的中指以后有活干了
I've got a job for the middle one.
89
00:04:11,550 --> 00:04:12,830
好
各位
Oh. hey, guys.
90
00:04:13,050 --> 00:04:14,130
你好
佩妮
Oh. hi, penny.
91
00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:19,200
休息一会吧
Take a break, guys.
92
00:04:19,420 --> 00:04:20,900
你们在干什么
What are you doing?
93
00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:23,370
我们在...搬点东西上来
We're just, you know, moving something upstairs.
94
00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:24,370
什么东西
What is it?
95
00:04:24,580 --> 00:04:28,030
就是个...时间机器
Just... you know. time machine.
96
00:04:28,250 --> 00:04:30,630
好的
不错
但我要赶去工作了
所以...
Yeah. okay. neat. but I really got to get to work.
97
00:04:30,850 --> 00:04:32,500
-再给我们几分钟
-我等不了几分钟
Just give us a few minutes. I don't have a few minutes.
98
00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:33,700
我已经晚了
I'm running really late.
99
00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:35,600
我有个简单的办法
Then, I have a simple solution.
100
00:04:35,820 --> 00:04:37,870
去到楼顶
跳到另一栋楼顶上
Go up to the roof. hop over to the next building.
101
00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:39,300
中间离得不远
There's a small gap--
102
00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,200
如果你容易晕就别往下看
Don't look down if you're subject to vertigo--
103
00:04:41,420 --> 00:04:42,370
然后走他们的楼梯井
And use their stairwell.
104
00:04:42,580 --> 00:04:43,970
你逗我玩呢
是吧?
You're joking, right?
105
00:04:44,180 --> 00:04:46,030
跟头晕有关的东西我从不开玩笑
Oh, I never joke when it comes to vertigo.
106
00:04:48,780 --> 00:04:51,670
该死
好吧
我去房顶看看
Damn. okay, I'll just take the roof.
107
00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:53,570
如果你能等我们把时间机器都弄好了
Hey, if you wait for us to set up the time machine,
108
00:04:53,780 --> 00:04:55,630
我可以把你送回到昨天上班时
I can drop you off at work yesterday.
109
00:04:57,620 --> 00:04:59,900
时光旅行
开个玩笑...别介意
Time travel joke. it's not... never mind.
110
00:05:01,620 --> 00:05:04,330
从它的用途来看
我觉得还是挺好笑的
For what it's worth, I thought it was humorous.
111
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:09,730
还是接着搬吧
Let's just do this.
112
00:05:09,950 --> 00:05:11,170
兄弟们准备好推了没?
You guys ready to push?
113
00:05:11,380 --> 00:05:12,430
马上
In a minute.
114
00:05:12,650 --> 00:05:15,470
霍华德到外面去吐了
Howard stepped outside to throw up.
115
00:05:20,280 --> 00:05:21,970
我不懂你到底在担心什么
I don't know what you were worried about.
116
00:05:22,180 --> 00:05:23,870
我觉得他放在房间里肯定能行
I think it really works in the room.
117
00:05:25,050 --> 00:05:26,100
是啊
Yeah.
118
00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:27,930
这绝对是我拥有过的
It is by far the coolest thing
119
00:05:28,150 --> 00:05:29,270
最酷的东西
I have ever owned.
120
00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:32,130
那个载着演员罗德·泰勒
The exact time machine that carried actor rod taylor
121
00:05:32,350 --> 00:05:33,530
从维多利亚时代的英格兰
From victorian england
122
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:35,470
到临近未来世界末日的时间机器
Into the post-apocalyptic future,
123
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,700
那个社会分裂成两个派系
Where society had splintered into the two factions
124
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,300
居住在地下的"莫洛克"
The subterranean morlocks, who survived by feasting
125
00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,300
他们靠吃住在地表的"埃洛依"维生
On the flesh of the gentle surface-dwelling eloi.
126
00:05:44,650 --> 00:05:47,500
真是性感的万人迷啊
Talk about your chick magnets.
127
00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:50,730
是
没错
Oh, yeah.
128
00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:52,870
那个住我旁隔壁的家伙总是
The guy who lives next to me is always like,
129
00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:54,470
"我的阳台上有个水流按摩浴缸
"i have a jacuzzi on my balcony.
130
00:05:54,680 --> 00:05:56,430
我的阳台上有个水流按摩浴缸"
I have a jacuzzi on my balcony."
131
00:05:56,650 --> 00:05:57,900
可等着看我告诉他
But wait until I tell him,
132
00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:00,330
"我的阳台上有一台时间机器
"i've got a time machine on my balcony.
133
00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:04,070
把泳裤裹裹紧吧
按摩浴缸"
Stuff that in your speedo, jacuzzi bob."
134
00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,370
先生们
我知道我们说好是轮流拥有它
Gentlemen, I know we said we'd take turns,
135
00:06:07,580 --> 00:06:08,500
但我想你们会认同说
But I think you'll agree
136
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:10,900
实际上就意味着它是留在这儿的
That practicality dictates it remain here.
137
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:12,470
你不能就这么独吞了
You can't just keep it here.
138
00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:13,730
假如我碰到个小妞然后跟她说
What if I meet a girl and say,
139
00:06:13,950 --> 00:06:15,300
"你想上去看看我的时间机器吗
"you want to come up and see my time machine?
140
00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:16,570
它在我朋友家里"
It's at my friends' house."
141
00:06:16,780 --> 00:06:18,500
多丢人啊!
How lame is that?
142
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,230
-他说的对
-好吧
He's got a point. all right,
143
00:06:20,450 --> 00:06:22,670
我觉得我们该订些基本原则
I think we're going to need some ground rules; in addition
144
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,270
除了"进时间机器禁止穿鞋"
To the expected "no shoes in the time machine,"
145
00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:26,170
以及"时间机器内禁止饮食"
And "no eating in the time machine,"
146
00:06:26,380 --> 00:06:28,030
我还建议"进时间机器
I propose we add "pants must be worn
147
00:06:28,250 --> 00:06:30,630
必须要穿裤子'
At all times in the time machine."
148
00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:32,830
赞成!
Seconded.
149
00:06:33,050 --> 00:06:34,530
我还准备在里面放条毛巾呢
I was going to put down a towel.
150
00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:40,200
我还是希望它能放在我的阳台上
I still want it on my balcony.
151
00:06:40,420 --> 00:06:42,630
我说我们就两月轮一次(或一月轮两次)吧
I say we move it on a bi-monthly basis.
152
00:06:42,850 --> 00:06:43,800
是啊
听上去挺公平
Yeah, that sounds fair.
153
00:06:44,020 --> 00:06:45,770
等等
两月轮一次很模棱两可啊
Hold on, bi-monthly is an ambiguous term.
154
00:06:45,980 --> 00:06:47,770
意思是每两月搬一次还是每个月搬两次?
Do you mean move it every other month or twice a month?
155
00:06:47,980 --> 00:06:49,170
-一月两次
-那就不行
Twice a month. then no.
156
00:06:49,380 --> 00:06:50,670
那好
两月一次
Okay, every other month.
157
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:51,870
还是不行
No.
158
00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:54,630
谢尔顿
你不能这么自私!
Sheldon, you can't be selfish.
159
00:06:54,850 --> 00:06:57,130
我们都付了钱
所以它是大家的
We all paid for it, so it belongs to all of us.
160
00:06:57,350 --> 00:06:59,130
现在快让开
别挡着我进我的时间机器
Now get out of the way so I can sit in my time machine.
161
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:14,000
好的
我设置时间到1876年3月10日
Okay, I am setting the dials for march 10, 1876.
162
00:07:14,220 --> 00:07:15,800
好主意
亚历山大·格雷厄姆·贝尔
Good choice, alexander graham bell
163
00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:17,900
发明了电话并打给了沃森博士
Invents the telephone and calls out for dr. watson.
164
00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:19,870
等等
我也想看看这个场面
Wait a minute. I'd want to see that, too.
165
00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:21,400
轮到你的时候
随你想干嘛
So when it's your turn, you can.
166
00:07:21,620 --> 00:07:23,300
不过如果我们都去同一个时间点
But if we all go back to the same point in time,
167
00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:25,270
贝尔的实验室就太挤了
Bell's lab is going to get very crowded.
168
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:26,400
他就会知道有大事发生了
He'll know something's up.
169
00:07:27,850 --> 00:07:29,530
而且时间机器不会进行空间上的位移
Also since the time machine doesn't move in space,
170
00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:32,070
所以你会"降临"在1876年的帕萨迪纳
You'll end up in 1876 pasadena.
171
00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:34,000
即使你降临在了波士顿
你又能干嘛呢
And even if you can make it to boston, what are you going to do?
172
00:07: 34,220 --> 00:07:35,170
敲贝尔的门跟贝尔夫人说
Knock on the door and say to mrs. bell,
173
00:07:35,380 --> 00:07:36,800
"嘿
贝尔夫人
我是你老公的疯狂粉丝
"hey, mrs. bell. big fan of your husband.
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00:07:37,020 --> 00:07:39,570
我能进来参观他发明电话吗?"
Can I come in and watch him invent the telephone?"
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00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:40,730
贝尔夫人是个聋子
Mrs. bell was deaf.
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00:07:40,950 --> 00:07:42,070
她甚至不会听到你敲门
She's not even going to hear you knock.
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00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:44,900
我有个办法
I have a solution.
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00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:48,170
首先去到未来弄一个隐身装置
First, go into the future and obtain a cloaking device.
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00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:49,200
多远的未来?
Ooh, how far into the future?
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00:07:49,420 --> 00:07:50,370
如果我没记错的话
If I remember correctly,
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00:07:50,580 --> 00:07:52,230
柯克舰长会在星际纪年5027.3
Captain kirk will steal a cloaking device
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00:07:52,450 --> 00:07:55,230
从罗姆兰偷走一个隐身装置(出自"星际迷航"系列)
From the romulans on stardate 5027.3,
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00:07:55,450 --> 00:07:58,700
之后被'先锋联盟舰队'于2328年1月10日所截获
Which would be january 10, 2328 by pre-federation reckoning.
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00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:05,300
好吧
那我把时间设到2328年1月10日
Okay, I am setting the dials for january 10, 2328.
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00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,800
向未来
出发
Here we go into the future.
186
00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:30,300
真有意思
That was fun.
187
00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:32,830
轮到我了
My turn!
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00:08:34,020 --> 00:08:36,000
首先
Okay, first of all,
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00:08:36,220 --> 00:08:38,500
那段你声称仅三英尺宽的距离
What you call a gap was nearly three feet wide.
190
00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:40,330
-让我滑倒摔伤了我的膝盖
-你还好吧?
I slipped and skinned my knee. are you okay?
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00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,370
其次
那扇通往旁边那幢楼的
Second of all, the door to the stairwell
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00:08:43,580 --> 00:08:44,630
楼梯井门是锁着的
Of the other building was locked,
193
00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:46,100
所以我不得不从防火梯下楼
So I had to go down the fire escape,
194
00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:47,230
可那只是到三楼的
Which ends on the third floor,
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00:08:47,450 --> 00:08:48,870
逼我只能从一个"可爱"的亚美尼亚家庭
Forcing me to crawl through the window
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00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,530
的窗户爬了进去
Of a lovely armenian family
197
00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:52,900
他们还强留了我吃午饭
Who insisted I stay for lunch.
198
00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:54,800
听起来还不坏嘛
That doesn't sound too bad.
199
00:08:55,020 --> 00:08:56,500
那是整整八斤羔羊肉
It was eight courses of lamb,
200
00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,230
他们还试图撮合我和他们的儿子
And they tried to fix me up with their son.
201
00:08:59,450 --> 00:09:01,970
-对不起
-还没完呢
I'm sorry. not done.
202
00:09:02,180 --> 00:09:03,400
等我终于好不容易
By the time I finally
203
00:09:03,620 --> 00:09:04,800
赶到那里上班
他们已经把我的班给换了
Got to work, they'd given my shift away.
204
00:09:05,020 --> 00:09:06,000
是啊
没错
Yeah, that's right.
205
00:09:06,220 --> 00:09:08,300
我损失了一整天的工资
就因为这个
I lost an entire day's pay thanks to this.
206
00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:10,170
-这个...
-时间机器
This... time machine.
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00:09:13,680 --> 00:09:15,600
灯会一闪一闪
托盘还会转
你想不想试试?
The lights flash and the dish spins. you want to try it?
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00:09:15,820 --> 00:09:16,970
才不!
No!
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00:09:17,180 --> 00:09:18,870
我才不想试试!
I don't want to try it!
210
00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,530
天哪
你们都已经是成年人了!
My god, you are grown men!
211
00:09:21,750 --> 00:09:23,270
你们怎么能浪费生命
How can you waste your lives with these
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00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,100
整天弄这些蠢玩具和傻戏服
Stupid toys and costumes
213
00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:27,100
还有漫画书还有...那个?!
And comic books and... and now that?!
214
00:09:27,320 --> 00:09:29,900
-那个...
-再次提醒
时间机器
That... again. time machine.
215
00:09:32,150 --> 00:09:33,900
拜托
那才不是什么时间机器
Oh, please, it's not a time machine.
216
00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:35,100
这顶多就是看上去像艾尔顿·约翰
If anything, it looks like something
217
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:37,530
驶过大沼泽地的代步工具
Elton john would drive through the everglades.
218
00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:45,330
这个只能在时间上移动
It only moves in time.
219
00:09:45,550 --> 00:09:48,730
这个在沼泽地里会比无用更无用
It would be worse than useless in a swamp.
220
00:09:53,420 --> 00:09:55,330
可悲!
你们这群人!
Pathetic! all of you!
221
00:09:55,550 --> 00:09:57,400
可悲到了极点!
Completely pathetic!
222
00:10:02,580 --> 00:10:03,770
该我了
My turn.
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00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,730
莱纳德
现在可是凌晨2点
Leonard, it's 2:00 in the morning.
224
00:10:21,950 --> 00:10:24,270
怎么了
So?
225
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:25,630
该我了
So it's my turn.
226
00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:30,770
你为什么把时间设在前天?
Why did you set it for the day before yesterday?
227
00:10:30,980 --> 00:10:33,770
因为我想回到那天
Because I want to go back and keep myself
228
00:10:33,980 --> 00:10:35,300
阻止自己买时间机器
From getting a time machine.
229
00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:37,100
这做不到
如果你想在过去
You can't. if you were to prevent yourself
230
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:38,330
阻止自己买时间机器
From buying it in the past,
231
00:10:38,550 --> 00:10:40,200
你就不可能现在拥有一台时间机器
You would not have it available in the present
232
00:10:40,420 --> 00:10:41,430
然后利用它回到过去
To travel back and stop yourself
233
00:10:41,650 --> 00:10:43,600
阻止自己买它
所以你仍然会拥有它
From buying it. ergo, you would still have it.
234
00:10:43,820 --> 00:10:45,830
这是典型的时间旅行低级错误
This is a classic rookie time-travel mistake.
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00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:52,570
我可以回到过去让你闭嘴吗?
Can I go back and prevent you from explaining that to me?
236
00:10:52,780 --> 00:10:54,100
同样的低级错误
Same paradox.
237
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,730
如果你想回到过去
If you were to travel back in time
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00:10:55,950 --> 00:10:57,130
比如说
把我打晕
And, say, knock me unconscious,
239
00:10:57,350 --> 00:10:58,600
那就不会有现在的对话
You would not then have the conversation
240
00:10:58,820 --> 00:11:00,070
来把你激怒
让你想回到过去
That irritated you, motivating you
241
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,400
并且把我打晕
To go back and knock me unconscious.
242
00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:06,130
如果我现在想把你打晕呢?
What if I knocked you unconscious right now?
243
00:11:07,620 --> 00:11:08,800
那也改变不了过去
It won't change the past.
244
00:11:11,380 --> 00:11:13,600
不过会让我现在好受很多
But it'd make the present so much nicer.
245
00:11:14,780 --> 00:11:17,100
你有什么事心烦吗
Are you upset about something?
246
00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:19,130
你从哪看出来的
What was your first clue?
247
00:11:19,350 --> 00:11:21,770
有很多地方
Well, it was a number of things.
248
00:11:21,980 --> 00:11:23,100
首先
你睡得很晚
First, the late hour.
249
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:24,430
其次
你的言行似乎没有活力
Then your demeanor seems very low-energy,
250
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:25,230
再加上你很易怒
Plus your irritability.
251
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:26,230
是的
我很心烦!
Yes, I'm upset!
252
00:11:27,780 --> 00:11:30,230
我一般可不大了解这些的
I don't usually pick up on those things.
253
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:31,460
我不赖啊
Good for me.
254
00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:35,830
是啊
你不赖
Yeah, good for you.
255
00:11:37,010 --> 00:11:38,090
等等
Oh, wait.
256
00:11:40,110 --> 00:11:42,290
你想聊聊为什么事心烦吗?
Did you want to talk about what's bothering you?
257
00:11:43,780 --> 00:11:44,560
不知道
可以吧
I don't know. maybe.
258
00:11:44,780 --> 00:11:46,360
哇
我今晚真是太强了
Wow. I'm on fire tonight.
259
00:11:51,180 --> 00:11:53,160
...是这样
Uh... here's the thing.
260
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:57,660
像佩妮这样的女孩是不会和玩时间机器的人在一起的
Girls like penny never end up with guys who own time machines.
261
00:11:57,880 --> 00:11:59,530
我不同意
I disagree.
262
00:11:59,740 --> 00:12:01,860
你追求佩妮失败的经历
Your inability to successfully woo penny
263
00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:05,160
是要远远早于得到时间机器的日期的
Long predates your acquisition of the time machine.
264
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,830
这个失败是显而易见的
That failure clearly stands on its own.
265
00:12:10,040 --> 00:12:12,030
多谢指出
Thanks for pointing it out.
266
00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:14,060
此外
你的前提是有瑕疵的
In addition, your premise is flawed.
267
00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:16,990
在原版电影中
罗德·泰勒就是用时间机器
In the original film, rod taylor got yvette mimieux
268
00:12:17,210 --> 00:12:18,590
得到了伊薇特·米米亚克斯(电影女主角)
With that very time machine.
269
00:12:18,810 --> 00:12:21,390
回到未来
马帝·麦克佛莱得到了机会
In back to the future, marty mcfly got the opportunity
270
00:12:21,610 --> 00:12:23,930
和他魅力十足的年轻妈妈鬼混
To hook up with his extremely attractive young mother.
271
00:12:26,740 --> 00:12:27,860
那些都是电影
Those are movies.
272
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,360
当然都是电影
Of course they're movies.
273
00:12:29,580 --> 00:12:31,430
你难道指望我举出个现实版
Were you expecting me to come up with an example
274
00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:34,290
时间机器的例子吗?
Involving a real-life time machine?
275
00:12:35,740 --> 00:12:37,060
荒谬
That's absurd.
276
00:12:39,780 --> 00:12:40,890
加油啊
伙计们
用力推!
Come on, guys, push!
277
00:12:41,110 --> 00:12:42,590
如果我再用力
If I push any harder,
278
00:12:42,810 --> 00:12:44,560
就快把结肠给"分娩"出来了
I'm going to give birth to my colon.
279
00:12:45,740 --> 00:12:47,160
好
各位
Oh, hey, guys.
280
00:12:47,380 --> 00:12:48,160
你好
佩妮
Oh. hi, penny.
281
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,490
休息一会吧
Take a break, guys!
282
00:12:53,710 --> 00:12:55,190
你们在干什么
What are you doing?
283
00:12:55,410 --> 00:12:59,030
你知道
就是搬搬时间机器
Oh, you know, just moving a time machine.
284
00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:01,860
好的
不错
但我要赶去工作了
所以...
Yeah. okay, neat, but I really gotta get to work, so...
285
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:03,590
没问题
No problem.
286
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:10,890
坚持一下
Hang on.
287
00:13:12,610 --> 00:13:14,530
但是...你的时间机器怎么办
But... what about your time machine?
288
00:13:14,740 --> 00:13:16,930
有些事情比玩具更重要
Some things are more important than toys.
289
00:13:25,740 --> 00:13:27,390
我好害怕
I'm scared.
290
00:13:27,610 --> 00:13:30,060
不要害怕
宝贝
有我在
Don't worry, baby. I've got you.
291
00:13:30,280 --> 00:13:31,260
哦
莱纳德
Oh, leonard.
292
00:13:51,380 --> 00:13:53,430
仍旧该我了
It's still my turn.
293
00:13:59,190 --> 00:14:00,110
你干什么
What are you doing?
294
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:03,480
把我收集的所有东西打包
I'm packing up all my collectibles
295
00:14:03,690 --> 00:14:05,880
然后带下去卖给漫画书店
And taking them down to the comic book store to sell.
296
00:14:06,090 --> 00:14:08,280
真的有必要吗
Was that really necessary?
297
00:14:08,490 --> 00:14:10,410
如果需要钱
你随时可以卖血啊
If you need money, you can always sell blood.
298
00:14:12,930 --> 00:14:14,610
还有精液
And semen.
299
00:14:14,830 --> 00:14:16,580
这和钱无关
This is not about money.
300
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:18,740
我们带了吃的
We brought food!
301
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,940
熏鲑鱼和硬面包圈
时间旅人的早餐
Lox and bagels, the breakfast of time-travelers.
302
00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:23,210
棒极了
Terrific.
303
00:14:23,430 --> 00:14:24,780
有人想要买我时间机器里的股份吗
Does anyone want to buy my share of the time machine?
304
00:14:24,990 --> 00:14:25,510
怎么
Why?
305
00:14:25,730 --> 00:14:26,910
我不想再要了
I don't want it anymore.
306
00:14:27,130 --> 00:14:27,910
为什么
Why?
307
00:14:28,130 --> 00:14:29,510
...私人原因
Just... personal reasons.
308
00:14:29,730 --> 00:14:31,450
我蜘蛛侠一般的嗅觉告诉我
My spidey sense tells me
309
00:14:31,490 --> 00:14:32,710
这和佩妮有关
This has something to do with penny.
310
00:14:32,930 --> 00:14:34,110
听着
Look,
311
00:14:34,330 --> 00:14:36,410
-你们到底想不想要买股份?
-我给你
Do you want to buy me out or not? I'll give you
312
00:14:36,630 --> 00:14:38,040
100美元
这样我就是半个拥有者了
A hundred dollars, which will make me half-owner
313
00:14:38,260 --> 00:14:39,340
然后我们把它放到我的阳台上去
And we'll put it on my balcony.
314
00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:40,640
去你的阳台
Screw his balcony.
315
00:14:40,860 --> 00:14:42,440
我给你120美元
我要放到我的车库
I'll give you $120 and we'll put it in my garage.
316
00:14:42,660 --> 00:14:44,440
我的股份当时是200美金
I paid $200 for my share.
317
00:14:44,660 --> 00:14:45,680
小子
大家都知道
Dude, everybody knows
318
00:14:45,890 --> 00:14:47,110
时间机器会因为转让
A time machine loses half its value
319
00:14:47,330 --> 00:14:48,610
而贬低一半的价值
The minute you drive it off the lot.
320
00:14:48,830 --> 00:14:50,780
我付200
I'll go for $200.
321
00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:52,41